Explaining To The Girlfriend!

[roadwarrior]

Geez....

You just made it to our "Best Of BassResource.com" listing.

I've been married for 35 years and this is some advice I can still

use!

Thank you happyhappa, that is outstanding!

p.s. Here is an idea for you: Buying Christmas gifts for women is a challenge

for men unless they are told EXACTLY what to buy. No shopping, just buying.

So, you might consider a new rod & reel for yourself. Tell him you would like

a St. Croix Avid AVS68MXF/ Shimano CI4 and 600 yards of Yo-Zuri Hybrid

#12. That will surprize him!

[quanjig]

My word! NAILED IT!! Im gonna share this with my wife, she is equally gifted in making me feel that fishing is an important part of our lives. I'm sure she will be happy to see that other women have the same thoughts and actions. Thanks for the great insite!

[scrutch]

Wow! I've been married for 13 years and I suddenly have this feeling that I know nothing.

Great post happyhappa!

[shootermcbob]

happyhappa, just let me say ....WOW. Your boyfriend is one lucky fellow.

Thanks for sharing the insights from the woman's point of view.

[redboat]

Guys, you're missing the point - as is Ms. Phd to be...

Wives NEED something to gripe about on a regular basis. As girlfriends they can repress this for a while but sooner or later it's gonna come out. If you deprive her of this necessary release of pent up female angst YOU are being cruel and needlessly hurtful. Now none of us wants to do that!

So, if she wants to carry on about you spending $700 (or $70,000) on fishing (which she really doesn't care about by the way) by all means ALLOW HER TO DO THIS! Just nod absently while she gripes away at you; after a half hour or so, look over at her and say as seriously as you can, "Huh? Did you say something?"

For non fishermen reading this forum (I have no idea why you'd want to do this but ok), throwing your clothes all over the floor works almost as well.

Hope this helps! I have other marriage advice, like what I told my neighbor when his wife of 25 years suddenly insisted they go to a marriage counselor. He didn't know what to do, poor guy!

I took him to a local gun and knife show, had him buy a 12 inch Bowie knife and a whetstone. I told him to sit there and not say anything, just sharpen the knife on the whetstone - and if he heard something he didn't like, stop. One trip, no more marriage counseling!

[redboat]

I've been married for ten years, by the way. My wife isn't the best housekeeper in the world; since she works full time I figure I can either shut up about that or do it myself. So i shut up.

The other day she was off work. She'd worked all day cleaning the house. When i got home around 6 she was exhausted, asleep on the couch. I looked around, houose looked pretty good.

"Joy," I yelled at her, "get up! Somebody broke into the house!"

She jumped up, "Huuuhh?"

"...they stole all the dirty clothes off the floor!"

[Fishing Rhino]

Somebody's having fun with this.

[roadwarrior]

I'm having fun, but there is no need to be nasty.

So a couple of posts have magically disappeared.

[J Francho]

[Fishing Rhino]

Who was being nasty? I wasn't even aware a couple of posts had disappeared.

[J Francho]

That's the point.

[Bass Junkie]

JFranco..... You're just wrong!!!!

[Fishing Rhino]

That's the point.

I still don't get the point. My post was quoted by RW. Since I didn't see the posts that "disappeared" I could not have been referring to them. Apparently my post was misunderstood.

[psuangler91]

Wow happyhappa, I'm pretty sure that's the most insightful journey into a woman's psyche most of us on here have ever read! Thank you, hopefully by next winter my girlfriend will be as happy as you and buying me rods and reels for christmas.

[J Francho]

Since I didn't see the posts that "disappeared" I could not have been referring to them.

Exactly!

[tomustang]

Suckers, I got the perfect wife

[roadwarrior]

Fishing Rhino,

Nothing was directed at you my friend. You saw the posts that

were deleted and my comments were directed there, not towards

you.

I think this thread has been enlightening, at least for me. My wife

just doesn't care, which has been fine by me. However, the suggestion

of bringing her into that part of my life appeals to me, especially now

that we have recently become "empty nesters".

[SoFlaBassAddict]

.... Long post ....

Got a sister?

[MrsTomustang]

Gentlemen...you NEVER, EVER want to fully understand our psyche.

I appreciate Happyhappa's contribution 100% but to try to understand female psyche.... 'the mind functioning as the center of thought, emotion, and behavior and consciously or unconsciously adjusting or mediating the body's responses to the social and physical environment.'.... Is as difficult as reconciling quantum physics and general relativity...at least string theory has a couple constants. :-)

Honestly, our center of influence and control goes as far as our OWN psyche and that is challenging enough.

Understand yourself. Self-awareness is critical. Our propensity to attribute behaviors to others is directly proportional to how we understand ourselves and our emotional baggage we carry around.

As an example, I may have personal past experience where I have been questioned about what I spend money on . Perhaps I grew up witnessing my mother nag relentlessly my father about money. If I am not aware of the impact to my psyche then next relationship, my boyfriend simply makes a statement about what I have bought and I recall the past and apply my emotional response to this situation. I have applied erroneously previous situational emotions to an innocent query.

Guilt is always a great one to seek external justification on. Again..own it...

Understand yourself and then you can seek to understand others.

[quanjig]

I'm dizzy.........

[slonezp]

Women are nuts, men are stupid, and life goes on.

[lazeebum]

This is an interesting thread. I think the comparison of Disney Land was accurate. That is the way I feel when I throw my leg over the bike or back the boat down the ramp. Good read happyhappa

[psuangler91]

Is as difficult as reconciling quantum physics and general relativity...at least string theory has a couple constants. :-)

Haha I got an A in that class but I don't think I could have passed "The female psyche 101"

[S Hovanec]

Guess I got lucky with mine! She doesn't seem to care what I get. She even went as far as telling me to order the boat that I wanted instead of 'settling' for something that I wouldn't be happy with.

[StinkyBass]

My wife enjoys going Bass fishing with me so it's a win-win situation.

Hey mine too! you cant go wrong there! BUT she didnt like it at first. had to teach her how to flip and pitch, use cranks and spinners, when and were and all that stuff! while i dont spend a huge amount on fishing gear (or at least not as much as i would like to) i had to buy her a rod that she liked. one that felt good to her and THEN she got it. she was using one of my "hand me downs". try showing her why you spend so much... but on the other hand, shes not married to you... why is she worried about your budget? unless you've bough more stuff instead of taking her out and spending money on her! that could be a BIG prob! good luck