Popeye Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Since I do all the "Hop Sing" chores around our place, i.e. pay the bills, do the grocery shopping, laundry, cooking (most of the time), my wife of 38 years supports almost any sport that I want to undertake when I have the time. In fact she'd PREFER that I be doing something like fishing to sitting on the couch getting plastered:o) Seeing as how she HATES fishing (she accompanied me a few times when we lived in Illinois after I retired from the Navy), she doesn't quite understand my passion for it, BUT she still supports it.... so much so that she allowed me to buy a little 2 1/2 acre mini-farm in northern Indiana to live on when I'm back there with my Mom, brothers, and sister visiting and FISHING my rear off after I retire this June. As the old expression goes "I wouldn't trade her for anything!" Still, I do at least TELL her when and where I'm gong to be doing this or that so she'll know where I am in case of an emergency or something like that:o) After all, I am NOT the only "breadwinner" in the house. My wife contributes to the household budget by working at her job which is WAY harder than mine! Quote
Guest avid Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Hmmmmmmmm. we seem to be talking about two things here. 1. Â Checking with the better half to see if there is an event we committed to and..... 2. Asking permission. In case #1 if the wife (as they always are) is the keeper of the social event calender, then checking with her to see, e.g. if your cousin's baby's christening is scheculed for Saturday, then of course. Â This is wise, prudent and relieves you of the responsiblity of having to remember stuff. But, if you have to ask permission............wow dude. Â You are truly a "meow" Quote
Super User Alpster Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 I couldn't help but notice that LBH & 4Bizz who "got that fishing thing straight" right up front. Neither of them are actually married. Â ;D I used to pound my fist on the table and TELL my wife "I'm going fishing" and after she beat the crap out of me we would have a nice long talk about good planning, courtesy and respect for each other's needs. Â Seriously, my wife was my favorite fishing partner. She died 6 years ago. The reason I haven't remarried is she set the bar pretty high. If you have an awesome wife like I did, don't take her for granted. You never know what tomorrow brings. JMHE Ronnie Quote
farmpond1 Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Hmmmmmmmm. we seem to be talking about two things here. 1. Checking with the better half to see if there is an event we committed to and..... 2. Asking permission. In case #1 if the wife (as they always are) is the keeper of the social event calender, then checking with her to see, e.g. if your cousin's baby's christening is scheculed for Saturday, then of course. This is wise, prudent and relieves you of the responsiblity of having to remember stuff. But, if you have to ask permission............wow dude. You are truly a "meow" Yes, there is (or should be) a distinction between coordinating plans/addressing responsibilities and asking for permission. Â I help my g-friend round the house and with yardwork every week and in return she never gives me a hassle when I want to go fishing. Â And if she wants to go out with her friends, that's fine too. Â If she regularly nagged me about my fishing, I'd be singing "I'm gonna miss her..." Quote
Super User fishfordollars Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 My wife and I have been together for 19 years. I help with all house work and even go shopping with her. YES shopping with her...Never, ever has she caused me to miss or cancell a fishing trip. Our club tournaments are schelduled out for the next 12 months so she knows that I will be fishing those and she has no problem with me schelduling other tournaments. What ever I spend on fishing she knows that she has free rein to do the same on any items she desires. She will go occasionally but not often. If she can't lay in the back of the boat she is not interested. I never have to ask but I always check to see if she has planned anything for the weeks I decide to fish that are not on the calender. Quote
Super User Bankbeater Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 My wife has stuff that she takes care of around the house and I have mine. As long as my responsibilities around the house are taken care of, my wife doesn't have a problem with me heading out on the weekend. Â Quote
Super User flechero Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 But, if you have to ask permission............wow dude. Â You are truly a "meow" And I'm supposed to be the judgmental one... Â that's pretty ironic. Quote
Super User Raul Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 Ask for "permission" ? Â :-? ........hmmmmmm, NOPE Â : Checking with the better half to see if there is an event we committed to and..... Absolutely. Quote
RAINCLOUD36 Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 My wife and I have been married 43 years and she is a good sport when it comes to my fishing obsession. It was her idea for me to join a club and fish tournaments. She made the first contact with a customer where she works and encouraged me to contact them and join the club. She also understands that Saturday or Sunday is my fishing day. She takes at least one vacation a year with a friend so it all equals out. Clearing it with your other half before you go seems to me is just common courtesy. Quote
Dukestor Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 I have a 6 month kitchen pass rule. Â if you ask at least 6 months out to be involved with something, then if she says no, she'll have to hear about it for the next 6 months. Â Works every time. Quote
Davis Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Clearing it with your other half before you go seems to me is just common courtesy. Agreed. Maybe thats the way this should have been worded. Permission sounds like asking your mother if you can go out and play lol. But like I said earlier.....I do clear it with my wife before I go out to the local fishing hole. Everytime. Called respect. Quote
Super User burleytog Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 No comment. Â :-X Quote
Bassnajr Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Good question!!! Anyone WHO IS MARRIED absolutely checks with the wife before making ANY plans never mind fishing. If you don't, then you won't be married for long. I would assume that the fishing buddys mentioned that are peed off are either single or divorced, and are giving their married buddies a hard time. If their not kidding and are truely mad, then I would find new fishing buddies. You don't respect my wife and family, YOU DON'T RESPECT ME!!! My wife knows how addicted I am to fishing and how much pleasure and peace it gives me. I am in a better mood, less stressed, and have a clearer head. When she she's NO to fishing, I know she has a very valid reason (money, family obligations etc.) and I don't ask twice. It's no. IMHO Â bassnajr Quote
Bassnajr Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 PS Married ADULTS don't ask permission from each other They do "run things by" each other...just figured I'd add that...... Quote
Fisher of Men Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 I couldn't help but notice that LBH & 4Bizz who "got that fishing thing straight" right up front. Neither of them are actually married. ;D I used to pound my fist on the table and TELL my wife "I'm going fishing" and after she beat the crap out of me we would have a nice long talk about good planning, courtesy and respect for each other's needs. Seriously, my wife was my favorite fishing partner. She died 6 years ago. The reason I haven't remarried is she set the bar pretty high. If you have an awesome wife like I did, don't take her for granted. You never know what tomorrow brings. JMHE Ronnie Ronnie, Apparently the fact that your wife passed on flew past me, but I truly can't imagine a life without mine (going on 17 years). Your positive attitude and faith in God truly shine through and is a true testimony. My wife is my fishing partner on many fishing trips (1 in 3 probably). I like Bassnajr's statement of "running it by each other" and that's what we do. This proves (not that I doubted) that there are some really classy gentlemen here at Bassresource.com. You all seem committed to your passion and the sport, but your committment to your spouses first is evident. -Fisher <>< P.S. Â Somewhere in this, I think about the old Hank Jr. song, "Attitude Adjustment". Â ;D Quote
farmpond1 Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 "Run things by" is a good way to put it. But for some (and thankfully, I'm not one of them) it isn't as simple as running things by one's spouse. Â I can see how some who haven't experienced it wouldn't understand it but there are controlling spouses/partners (both male and female). Â I respect my girlfriend and she respects me. Â And both of us have the freedom to do what we want. Â We try to work as a team. Â But we have a friend who isn't so "lucky." Â Even my girlfriend (a female perspective) thinks his wife is far too aggressive and domineering. Â It bothers me but what am I going to do? Â Except, perhaps, vent on forums such as this. :-/ Quote
Super User Sam Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 Only when I take the boat out or fish locally on weekends. I can fish in the afternoons before dinner or after dinner or early in the AM as long as I am local. Otherwise, it is an insult to take off and go fishing and leave her at home. Quote
Super User fourbizz Posted January 10, 2008 Super User Posted January 10, 2008 I couldn't help but notice that LBH & 4Bizz who "got that fishing thing straight" right up front. Neither of them are actually married.  ;D Maybe that is why I get to fish so much . I do know some non married guys whose girlfriends keep their guys  bean bag in their purse though.... Quote
Siebert Outdoors Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 I couldn't help but notice that LBH & 4Bizz who "got that fishing thing straight" right up front. Neither of them are actually married. ;D Maybe that is why I get to fish so much . I do know some non married guys whose girlfriends keep their guys bean bag in their purse though.... LOL, Â Fourbizz your killing me. Â Maybe thats why I get to fish whenever I want too. Â The second job gets in the way more then the lady friend. Â Right now I've got it too good to be one of those married guys. Â Maybe in a year or ten. Quote
Zel Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 I live with FEAR every day but sometimes she lets me go fishing. Quote
George Welcome Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Remember: It is always easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission. That being said I have to put a bandage on this bump on my head. Quote
George Welcome Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Good observation gman. There is no similarity between being married and living with someone. Somewhere in the wedding ceremonial words, completely unheard by the male, are those words: do you promise to let the women run your world: and of course the automatic male response is - I do. Â :'( Quote
Super User Raul Posted January 11, 2008 Super User Posted January 11, 2008 That 's because the moment you say : "yes I do" in front of witnesses and friends she becomes in SHE WHO MUST BE OBEYED. Quote
dave Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 Remember: It is always easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission. That being said I have to put a bandage on this bump on my head. ;D Â Quote
dave Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 There are benefits to mutual respect. Â If you know what I mean. Quote
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