Ok let me have it!

[Catt]

Gone  

[SPEEDBEAD.]

$250 a day sounds like a great price for what you are giving to the student, but I dont know if there should be a "minimum" of two days.

-Maybe stating that a "minimum" of two days is recommended as opposed to mandatory?  Some people will have the time and money for two days, others may not and might shy away from your service.

-From a customer standpoint, you are effectively advertising a $250 price tag that is in reality a $500 final price.   Two days for $500 is a great price, but as a consumer I dont know that I would like a minimum time frame dictated to me.

-Is the midday break/lunch provided for the client?  Are you going with the client to lunch?  

-Make "Teachers" singular, as you are the sole teacher in this school currently.

-Something about the title saying "a major deficiency in their bass fishing knowledge" just doesnt sound right to me.  Perhaps "The Structure Fishing School: Helping anglers become confident with the art of fishing structure."    Keep it positive.

Obviously, I am not a professional.  I looked at it as a consumer would.

Wayne

[Catt]

Proposal Summary

The Structure Fishing School: Bringing the wonderful world of structure fishing to the every day angler.

Introduction of the Organization

Teachers:

Thomas Paul Thibodeaux

256 E. Parkway

Lake Charles, Louisiana 70605

Home: 337-000-0000

Email: catt951@haha.com

Experience

44 years fishing structure

37 years fishing Toledo Bend

35 years fishing tournaments

33 years devout student of Elwood L. " Buck" Perry

Patrick C. Miller

Hemphill, Texas

Cell: 337-111-1111

Email: None

Experience

30 years fishing structure

34 years fishing Toledo Bend

15 years fishing tournaments

30 years devout student of Tommy catt Thibodeaux

Classes include:

Going out in your boat in your area of the lake teaching you how to read Topographical Maps and locate structure with electronics.

Explaining how to locate structure in ways that you can understand

Emphasis placed on education not just catching.

Empowering you to make your own decisions

Where:

Toledo Bend Reservoir

Rates:

two day class: $500

for each additional day $225

Hours:

Start: 7:00 am to 11:00 a.m.

Midday break/lunch: 11:00 am 3:30 pm

Then back out at 4:00 p.m. until

[SPEEDBEAD.]

I like the looks of the changes, but still would word the "major deficiency" differently.

Look at it this way: I, as the consumer, am coming to you for help with a specific subject. I already know that I am lacking in the particular area that you are proficient. Personally, I dont want my day starting off thinking that the teacher assumes I have a "major deficiency."

Everyone you may come in contact with will have varying levels of expertise in your structure school.  You, as the teacher, should evaluate that person's individual level and proceed as such.  Again, some students will not be majorly deficient and will have a decent grasp of the subject matter, only requiring a polishing from you.  Others, well let's just say you might have your hands full with a majorly deficient person.  

It's like graduating high school and enrolling in college classes such as "I can't believe you don't fluently speak Spanish 101" and "All Freshman are dumb arses"

It just feels negative to me, like I'm being looked down on from the get-go.

[Sam]

Looks good to me.

If I wanted to learn Toledo Bend I would certainly call for a two day trip.

$250/day is the going rate for the top guides in Virginia.

It is worth every penny.  

[Bass Dude]

I don't know if you're aware, but John Crews is doing the same sort of thing for $850.  His is only one day, but people may see your price and shell out the extra $350 to go with the Elite Pro.

[John G.]

Do you have a guide license? I would assume one is needed.

[George Welcome]

Recreational fishing and hunting licenses may be purchased online or by telephone using Visa or MasterCard. Call toll free 1-888-765-2602. An authorization number for immediate use will be provided and licenses will be mailed to the licensee.

A SERVICE FEE IS CHARGED.

Guides operating charter fishing vessels in saltwater areas of the state must possess a Charter Boat Fishing Guide License. The license is required for resident and non resident guides. A saltwater guide may not possess a spotted seatrout permit.

The annual fee for a resident Charter Boat Fishing Guide License is $250 per vessel for those carrying no more than six passengers and $500 per vessel for boats carrying more than six passengers.

The annual fee for the non resident Charter Boat Fishing Guide License is $1,000 per vessel for those carrying no more than six passengers and $2,000 per vessel for boats carrying more than six passengers.

To qualify for purchase of a Charter Boat Fishing Guide License, the captain of a charter vessel must present his valid captain's license issued by the U.S. Coast Guard, a valid driver's license or state issued ID, and his Louisiana recreational fishing license. The guide license is valid for one year beginning January 1 of each year.

NEW APPLICANTS MUST APPLY IN PERSON IN THE BATON ROUGE OFFICE ONLY.

RENEWALS MAY BE MAILED IN OR HANDLED IN PERSON AT THE BATON ROUGE LOCATION ONLY.

A ?Mothership License? shall be required for charter fishing operation which does not have a charter boat fishing guide present and consists of a large vessel carrying small skiffs that will be used by no more than two people for fishing purposes. The main motorized vessel shall carry a ?Mothership License? and the captain must have a valid captain's license issued by the United States Coast Guard on his person. For vessels carrying up to six skiffs, the license fee shall be one thousand dollars per year. For those vessels carrying more than six skiffs, the license fee shall be $2,000 per year.

In addition, each skiff is required to have a ?Charter Skiff License? which identifies the charter vessel to which it is attached. A license skiff shall only be used for fishing purposes while the charter vessel with which it is identified is located in Louisiana territorial waters. Each charter skiff license shall be issued for an annual cost of $50 per skiff.

The ?Mothership License? and the ?Charter Skiff License? shall be valid for one year, beginning on January 1st of each calendar year and expiring on December 31 of the same calendar year.

Licensing requirements for individuals fishing under the direction of a mothership operation or a charter guide are listed in the ?Recreational Regulations? pamphlet or on the website at www.wlf.louisiana.gov.

Federal law requires a 6-pak license for any Federally navigable waters and any interstate waters. Toledo Bend is interstate.

[George Welcome]

Looks good to me.

If I wanted to learn Toledo Bend I would certainly call for a two day trip.

$250/day is the going rate for the top guides in Virginia.

It is worth every penny.

Sam,

Just curious: what top guide is doing trips in Virginia for $250?

[Sam]

George,

Teddy Carr is now $275 for a five-hour trip.

Others out there are around $250.

I wonder if they are open to "deals" at this time of economic slowdown?  :-[

[Catt]

I don't know if you're aware, but John Crews is doing the same sort of thing for $850. His is only one day, but people may see your price and shell out the extra $350 to go with the Elite Pro.

And not learn a single thing more than I can teach em

[Skunked in DR]

You specify going out in your boat, in your area of the lake.   This implies to me that I wouldn't be able to attend if I were coming in from out of town.

Perhaps another price is warranted for those not wanting to or unable to bring a boat.

Just my $0.02

[SirSnookalot]

Minor critique, use an email address that sounds more professional or one that pertains to fishing or the object of your class.  

Lunch break way too long, I'd charge a bit more and be out there longer.

You may want list that the student may need a fishing license and cost.  Sounds like everyone would know that, but I'm sure it's overlooked.