Women.....

[SoFlaBassAddict]

Apparently I needed to cut the grass today because my girl has friends coming over tomorrow afternoon. I'm fine with that. She comes home and instantly walks outside and the following ensues...

Her: "You didn't cut the grass?!"

Me: "Oh, I forgot. Sorry about that, I'll cut it in the morning."

Her: "I wanted it done today though."

Me: "Well, I did work close to 70 hours in the last three days. I just forgot. Like I said, I'll cut it in the morning for you."

Her: "I wanted it done today so that my friends didn't drag the cut grass into the house."

Me: "Ok, I won't cut it in the morning then."

Her: "But it needs to get cut!"

Me: "Uh....you want it cut, but you don't want there to be any cut grass?"

Her: "Yes, why is this so hard to understand."

Me: "....."

Her: Looks on the verge of exploding

Me: "Ok, now that you've confused the hell out of me, what would you like me to do? Cut it, or don't cut it. Either way I'm screwed here, so just help me pick the lesser of two evils."

Her: "UGH!" And she just walks away.

And women wonder why men want to kill them sometimes...

[OHIO]

That sucks, but it gave me a good laugh.

At least you aren't one of those "I'll do anything for you honey!" types.

[Bassn Blvd]

Let's get this right. SHE wants the yard cut because HER friends are coming over? Hmmm :-?...

I think it's time to stick out your chest, fluff your feathers and man up- DON'T cut it ;D.

In fact, you ain't got a hair on your ars if you cut it.

Chicken, chiken chicken .

Better yet, I bet you don't have the balls to start cutting it just as her friends arrive. 

[BASSclary]

Lol good laugh!! ;D

Make sure when you cut the lawn to get the clippings EVERYWHERE  ;D

Heck, maybe you could just weed whack the edges and leave the lawn uncut!! ;D

[Bassn Blvd]

You have to make all your posts in the ladies section for the next month if you cut it.

[SoFlaBassAddict]

What I'll probably end up doing is grabbing a beer, launching the boat, and going fishing out back.  I definitely like the idea of firing up the mower right as her friends show up.  That should be worth a laugh or two.

[grimlin]

It'll also put you in the dog house for a month or two...  ;D

[Root beer]

I think she assume you have one of these:

http://www.google.com/products/catalog?q=grass+collector&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&cid=1209970416948280393&ei=4wTWTK3FJYKglAeYuKSECQ&sa=X&oi=product_catalog_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CCMQ8wIwAA#

;D

[OHIO]

I think she assume you have one of these:

http://www.google.com/products/catalog?q=grass+collector&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&cid=1209970416948280393&ei=4wTWTK3FJYKglAeYuKSECQ&sa=X&oi=product_catalog_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CCMQ8wIwAA#

;D

Worst invention ever made. I hate whoever thought of it.

I used to mow the lawn at my parents house and they made me collect the grass to use as fertilizer.

It takes about twice as long because you have to dump it every 10 minutes and not to mention that it is virtually impossible to use when it's wet out.

[shootermcbob]

I would like to know what you do for a living if you have worked 70 out of the 72 previous hours??? If you are not sleep testing mattresses, I hope you don't have to drive anywhere.

For my two cents, I say tell her "if you want the grass mowed so bad, mow it yourself" . Followed by an emphatic " I'm going fishing!"

[GTrombly]

Tell her you are a equal rights activist and she is a chauvinist pig if she thinks it your job to cut the grass. Doesn't work for me but i have hope in you.

[Jigfishn10]

Sounds like you have the all-american marriage...about as happy as mine... ;D

[fishfordollars]

If you cut it you automatically lose your man card for a month.

[SoFlaBassAddict]

10 AM and it still aint cut.  This should get fun in a while.  Methinks it's time to remind her who paid for this house.

[ROCbass]

I would like to know what you do for a living if you have worked 70 out of the 72 previous hours??? If you are not sleep testing mattresses, I hope you don't have to drive anywhere.

For my two cents, I say tell her "if you want the grass mowed so bad, mow it yourself" . Followed by an emphatic " I'm going fishing!"

Is this a real job? Where do I apply?

[Root beer]

Tell her you are a equal rights activist and she is a chauvinist pig if she thinks it your job to cut the grass. Doesn't work for me but i have hope in you.

This.... ;D

[Bassn Blvd]

Anyone hear from S.FlBassAddict?  Someone who knows where he lives needs to do a drive-by and check on him.  I hope we didn't talk him into getting his ars kicked . 

I said cut the yard, NOW  !  And when you're done, get in the house and  or no  for a month.

[BASSclary]

What if his wife broke all his combos and threw all his tackle into the water 

[SoFlaBassAddict]

The bad part, she's not even my wife...rofl Reasons like this are why I play on not getting married for a long while.

Needless to say, I didn't cut the yard. She apologized for making such a stink about it. I did fire up the motor after her friends had been here for about half an hour though. The reaction I got was just priceless. I wish I had a picture of it. Trust me, if she broke my rods and reels, I'd take her offshore and go trolling with her body parts.

[slonezp]

Women..."Can't live with 'em...can't shoot 'em" ;D

[OHIO]

The bad part, she's not even my wife...rofl Reasons like this are why I play on not getting married for a long while.

Needless to say, I didn't cut the yard. She apologized for making such a stink about it. I did fire up the motor after her friends had been here for about half an hour though. The reaction I got was just priceless. I wish I had a picture of it. Trust me, if she broke my rods and reels, I'd take her offshore and go trolling with her body parts.

That gave me a good laugh. ;D ;D ;D

[Redlinerobert]

This is easily one of the best threads on BR in ages.   ;D  Good man on not cutting the grass.  Would have loved to see a picture of her expression when you fired up the lawnmower with her friends there!   ;D

[=Matt 5.0=]

No bag on the mower?  :-?

[SoFlaBassAddict]

Bag schmag.  It mulches.  And I cut it regularly.  Rarely does it leave a bunch of stuff lying in the yard.

[Bassin_Fin@tic]

I would like to know what you do for a living if you have worked 70 out of the 72 previous hours??? If you are not sleep testing mattresses, I hope you don't have to drive anywhere.

For my two cents, I say tell her "if you want the grass mowed so bad, mow it yourself" . Followed by an emphatic " I'm going fishing!"

Oh, but see that opens a new can of worms,as does most anything you say in these situations. If your not too tired to go fishing then why are you too tired to cut the grass?!?! :-?