Words you wish you could take back

[Fishing Rhino]

Nah, I don't mean things said in anger or frustration.  I mean things that can and will be taken the wrong way.

It was out of my mouth before I could stop it.

Last name changed to protect the guilty.

We went to the pharmacy to get a birthday card and a few items.  The pharmacist, who we've known for years named Peter, greeted us by saying, "How are the Armstrongs today?"

In a snappy reply, I asked him, "How's the Peter today?"  He said, "Fine."

I then slunk around the corner to where the consultation window is.  He came over and I apologized.  Told him it was out of my mouth before I realized how it sounded.

He looked puzzled for a moment, then couldn't stop laughing.  Fortunately there were only a couple of others around, and it seemed to pass over their heads.  Maybe they were just being polite.

As we were leaving, my wife asked me what I had said to Peter.  It had gone over her head, but she said it explained why I had turned red.

[brushhoggin]

ah ha. thats hilarious. larry david-esque

[Jigfishn10]

Fishining Rhino, when I joined you asked me to PM you if I wanted to go and fish one day and I always kepy that in the back of my mind. Now I want to go fishiing with you, you have the same sense of humor I do.

Let's try and go out some point before the season ends!

That was good.

[Daddyodo]

I used to work at a golf retail store and one day a couple comes in and walks over to the ladies clubs. I did not see what they looked liked because their backs were turned. So any way I walk up to see if they need help and I notice the woman is pretty big. I thought she was pregnant so I said "congratulations when are you due?' She proceeds to get very upset and say"s very sarcastically " I'm not pregnant you a_ _ "and she and her husband stormed out of the store. :-[ :-[( For lunch that day I had a size 13 Nike shoe)

[SDoolittle]

"I do" (twice)

[BassCatt]

I had a neighbor who had some obvious plastic surgery done on her face. For this neighborhood, plastic surgery wasn't all that uncommon, seemed lots of people were having stuff done.

I'm in the garage one day messing with my boat when I heard the neighbor and my wife talking about, "the face". Not wanting to be rude, I stopped what I was doing and walked out of the garage and cheerily asked.... so how's the face? She lost all expression and stomped away, not saying a word.

My wife quickly informed me, they were talking about landscaping around "the place"... not "her face". We have since moved...

[moby bass]

"I do" (twice)

The longest sentence in the world.  You beat me to it.

[pa mountain man]

It wasn't so much a word...

I was in Walmart checking out the fishing clearance items in the very back corner, when the chili I had for dinner rears it's ugly head. I look around...nobodys around, perfect opportunity right? I let out a long loud BBBEEERRRRRTTTT, turn around to leave, and there is a couple looking at me, so what do I do? In a loud voice I say"Bert? Bert, where are you? Now where did he go?" as I exited the isle.

[OHIO]

It wasn't so much a word...

I was in Walmart checking out the fishing clearance items in the very back corner, when the chili I had for dinner rears it's ugly head. I look around...nobodys around, perfect opportunity right? I let out a long loud BBBEEERRRRRTTTT, turn around to leave, and there is a couple looking at me, so what do I do? In a loud voice I say"Bert? Bert, where are you? Now where did he go?" as I exited the isle.

Ha, I bet you fooled em. ;D ;D

[Bankbeater]

Out fishing one day, I said that I needed to fix my skirt. I heard about it the rest of the day.

[fishfordollars]

"I want a divorce."

She was a good woman that I did wrong.

I was lucky to get the one i have now. No one diserves to have another great woman after the way i did the first.

[ROCbass]

Predicting the Bills would go .500 this year :

[Sam]

Many years ago I was at a party and this young lady had a blouse that hung on her like a maternity outfit.

So, brilliant me, I asked her when she was due.

Of course she was not pregnant.

Learned a valuable lesson that day.  ;D   ;D  ;D

[Fishing Rhino]

Many years ago I was at a party and this young lady had a blouse that hung on her like a maternity outfit.

So, brilliant me, I asked her when she was due.

Of course she was not pregnant.

Learned a valuable lesson that day. ;D ;D ;D

Congratulations, that is even worse than mine. 

Here's a good bit of advice to remember.

When you meet two women, maybe sisters, and you are wondering about their ages, be sure to ask which one is younger, never ask which one is older.

The first question will provide the answer, but without the offense the second could generate.

[Sfritr]

"I do" (twice)

Took the words right out of my mouth!!!!!!!! :-? ;D ;D

[farmpond1]

"I do" (twice)

You beat me to it also.