Point System

[FishingBuds]

GENTLEMEN REMEMBER IT WELL.............

In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy.

Do something she likes and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points

are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects.

Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a non-exhaustive guide

to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES

You make the bed (+1)

You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)

You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) in the rain (+8)

But return with Beer (-5)

You check out a suspicious noise at night (+1)

You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)

You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)

You pummel it with iron rod (+10)

It's her pet (-20)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

You stay by her side the entire party (0)

You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with an old school friend

(-2)

Named Tina (-10)

Tina is a dancer (-20)

Tina has silicone implants (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY

You take her out to dinner (+2)

You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+3)

Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)

And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)

It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the

colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

You take her to a movie (+1)

You take her to a movie she likes (+3)

You take her to a movie you hate (+6)

You take her to a movie you like (-2)

It's called 'Death Cop' (-3)

You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE

You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)

You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)

You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian

shirts (-30)

You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)

THE BIG QUESTION

She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) (Yes, you lose points no matter what)

You hesitate in responding (-10)

You reply, "Where?" (-35)

Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like

a concerned expression (0)

You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)

You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)

She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-4000)

[Shad_Master]

Excellent - thanks for sharing

[done]

You forgot the disclaimer:

**management reserves the right to negate, change, nullify, or suspend point system in any manner, without any notice at any time. Players are to be held accountable to know all modifications the instant they happen and will be penalized accordingly.....

[fish-fighting-illini]

  That's a classic right there

[I.rar]

hah , thats great. my fiance will get a kick out of that.

[fish-fighting-illini]

  You'll think I making this up but not more than 5 hrs after I posted my wife comes home from the wedding day hair deal.

  "She says how does my hair look?"

  My 1st reaction was that it made her head look like a clothes iron!

  I was wondering how many points just thinking it costs, and how many for actually saying it?

I can tell you what it already has cost!   :'(

just curious

FFI - AKA Matt Crum

[Red]

Thats funny stuff.  But I want to know, what do I do with the points if I happen to accunulate a few?  Can I cash them in for certain "things"   ;D

[slonezp]

Thats funny stuff. But I want to know, what do I do with the points if I happen to accunulate a few? Can I cash them in for certain "things" ;D

Good luck with that ;D

[cart7t]

You're kidding yourself if you think a women scores a man any more than 1 point on anything.

Buy her a nice car for her BD = 1 point.

Buy her a little tricket for her BD she happened to mention while you were out browsing in a store one day a month ago = 1 point.

Diamond ring = 1 point.

etc, etc.....

The negative points accumulate rapidly and are scored at a much higher rate. It's takes a while to level up the scorecard if you happen to pull some stupid boneheaded move like buying tickets to a monster truck bash at the state fairgrounds which just so happens to fall on her birthday and SHE HATES MONSTER TRUCKS.

[Scorcher214]

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

You stay by her side the entire party (0)

You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with an old school friend

(-2)

Named Tina (-10)

Tina is a dancer (-20)

Tina has silicone implants (-80)

Does not matter if your married or not that is funny!

[done]

In light of my keeping firearms in the home, and my wifes fingers being programmed into the biometric safe holding them, in 10 years of marriage, I have wondered, exactly how far onto the negative side of points you go until you approach the death penalty.

I hope if/when I get there she goes into the large safe and uses the shotgun, she is not as good a shot with the handguns and who needs to suffer like that.

[Tokyo Tony]

Nothing more infuriating than the empowered female. Here's a revised list:

SIMPLE DUTIES

She makes the bed (0 - it's expected)

She makes the bed, but forgets the decorative pillow (-10 points for having a decorative pillow)

She throws the bedspread over rumpled sheets (0 - you wouldn't notice, although you hope she wouldn't do this as you like to think she's trained properly)

She goes out to buy you what you want (0 - she's just doing what she's told) in the rain (no difference)

But returns with Beer (0 - she should have already stocked the fridge before you noticed the supply was getting low)

She checks out a suspicious noise at night (0 - you didn't even know it because you were sleeping because you're not afraid of such trivial things)

She checks out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (see above)

She checks out a suspicious noise and it is something (-10 because presumably she wakes you up after finding it's "something")

She pummels it with iron rod (-20 - not only did she wake you up, but she ruined either your golf club or your fishing rod)

It's your pet (divorce)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

She stays by your side the entire party (-20 - annoying)

She stays by her side for a while, then leaves to chat with an old school friend

(0 - who cares)

Named Tina (0 - who cares)

Tina is a dancer (+5 - nice)

Tina has silicone implants (+10 - nicee)

A NIGHT OUT

She takes you to a movie (+1)

She takes you to a movie you likes (0 - expected)

She takes you to a movie she hates (0 - how would you know? She's not supposed to express her opinions)

She takes you to a movie she likes (0 - see above)

It's called 'Butterfly Love with Clouds and Rainbows' (-5 - obviously you don't get as far as entering the theater upon seeing the title, but -5 for the inconvenience)

She lied and said it was an action film with explosions and boobs (0 - you would not have fallen for this, so you never would have left the house)

HER PHYSIQUE

She develops a noticeable potbelly (-150)

She develops a noticeable potbelly and exercises to get rid of it (-75 - never should have happened in the first place)

She develops a noticeable potbelly and resorts to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian

shirts (divorce)

She says, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (divorce - women should not think they're allowed to talk back)

COMMUNICATION

When she wants to talk about a problem...(-50 - stop right there, you're not her emotional tampon. That's what her girlfriends are for.)

It goes on for over 30 minutes (still -50 because if she didn't stop talking when you told her to initially, you would have already tuned her out and started doing something else, not realizing she continued to speak.)

[done]

"emotional tampon"

LOL. That is a new one. Be a good name for a band.