thought for the day

[.ghoti.]

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.

[Muddy]

I don't see why the brides father got upset just because I said

She doesn't look pregnant

[bass wrangler569]

Never play leap-frog with a unicorn

[Root beer]

He who laugh last, thinks the slowest.

[MillerTime]

Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.

[Maxximus Redneckus]

"crowded elevator smells different to midget"

[SPEEDBEAD.]

A man who dreams of eating big marshmallows will wake up with no pillow.

[Muddy]

A man who dreams of eating big marshmallows will wake up with no pillow.

Hey Honey, Did you see the CAT?????

[Tokyo Tony]

He who farts in church sits in own pew.

[Avalonjohn44]

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.

...I think I get it...

[1inStripes]

I'm an early bird and I'm a night owl, so I'm wise and have worms

[SPEEDBEAD.]

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

[roadwarrior]

Fat girls need lovin' too!

8-)

[fatmanslim247]

Man who goes to bed with an itchy butt wakes up with a smelly finger

[bilgerat]

What would a chair look like if your legs bent the other way ?

[farmpond1]

He who walks sideways through airport turnstyle is going to Bangkok.

[Muddy]

I bought a house with a circular drive way, now it takes me a tank of $%@! ing gas to get to work every day>>>Steven Wright

[Hannons Hound]

You know your tie is too long, when you pee on it.

[bigdog]

brown spots on the wall by who flung poo

[MitchIsFishin]

Fat girls need lovin' too!

No, you simply need a bag of flour and you............ never mind.

d**n, I'm missing a buttonhole in my shirt.............

[Muddy]

What the Zen Buddhist ordered from the Hot dog vendor:

MAKE ME ONE WITH EVERYTHING

[.ghoti.]

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Just proves the worm should have stayed in bed.