THE ORIGINAL MUDDY VS THE TROLLING MOTOR STORY

[Muddy]

A few fellas PM'd me for this so here is the story in it's sorry entity:

Mar 30th, 2007, 5:39pm Ok here it goes: Muddy and Ron get the keys to the boat. It has a foot controlled trolling motor up front and a consoled steering 40 HP outboard with a trim on it. Ron got a fast explanation from Rick( the d^^K) boat rental guy and to top it off the trolling motor was defective.

Me and Ron had never been in a power boat that wasn't tiller steered. We fired up the engine and headed out, so we thought. Ron gets the boat straight and pointed out to the lake, and opens it up all the way and all I can see is the sky. The boat is straight up and we are going relatively fast and we can't see anything in front of us. Ron says "Hey Dominick take the front seat off" I say "What %^ difference is that going to make the boat is still in the way."

LBH and Brent come over and they look like their watching a Marx Bros. routine they are laughing so loud. LBH comes in the boat and asked if we were having trouble, which is like asking Don King if he's having a bad hair day! I say " No trouble, just can't see were the &%&T we are going" He asked if we trimmed the engine and of course We didn't have a scissors so how could we trim the engine.So he shows us what to do and tells me and Ron to follow em out on to Fork and the wind is blowing up to 40mph gusts.

So like the 2 mooks we are, dressed in only tee shirts and shorts ( I'm trying to figure out why Brent and Russ have Rain Gear on , on a clear day) follow them Of course there doing about 100mph and our top speed is 25mph and all of a sudden a good portion of the lake is coming in on top of me and Ron. Im talking soaked!!!! I kept asking Ron to follow further back b/c I think that's whats causing the problem. Finally they stop and by the time we ccatch up to them we looked like we just got out of the Maytag after the rinse cycle. I'm spitting water outta my mouth and I swear this to be true Water was running out of Ron's ears.Again Russ and Brent are falling outta their drawers with laughter, I thought it was funny myself

Now its time to fish so Ron asks me to go up front to work the trolling motor. So I pull the cord and down it goes and now the source of the problem I have no idea how to steer it. So I step on what I think is the gas pedal for it ( It looks just like a &*%%*& Gas Pedal) and mash it completely down and we take off in a continuous right turning circle. I tried to turn the top of the motor by hand I don't have even a clue All i know is I step on the pedal and we keep going in a right handed circle. Well Russ and Brent, who have by now given up on fishing having found 2 mooks in a boat to be more entertaining than the monsters of Lake Fork are coming in on us fast . I'm really getting frustrated because Russ is moving his boat right to us, I see him stepping on his pedal and his boat is going straight and I'm freaking mad. If that motor wasn't attached to the boat i would have been paying for a new on because i would have thrown it in the lake by now.

They get up to us and Russ once again jumps into our boat and I'm ticked off because hes just laughing but Brent is literally howling at this point

I'm so &^&*&$% Mad at this point I want to tell Russ no matter what i do i step on the gas pedal and it will go fast but only goes to the right What I said next winds up making BassResource.com history

Russ asks what the problem is all I could get out was" the harder I press the righter we go!!!!" at which point Russ and Ron and Brent loose it completely and I'm looking for something or someone to throw off the freaking boat!!!!!!Russ then explains about the direction arrow on the top of the motor head and rocking your foot back to go left and forward to go right. SO THATS WHAT THE &%&* PROBLEM was, NO ONE *$%(* EXPLAINED THAT TO ME. They weren't hearing any excuses they were laughing to hard and it took a while for me to calm down and be able to laugh at myself and enjoy the moment. Now I'm stuck with having said it. But let me just put this in it's not like Ron was any big help either he wasn't exactly Popeye the sailor man back there!!!!!!!

So we see the hump we are looking for on the depth finder and i put down the trolling motor when we get to the shallow part of it. THE TROLLING MOTOR IS NOW DEAD!!!!!!!!! So Rons fires up the big motor and I forgot to pick up the tolling motor. We are finally starting to dry off and the sun feels good , we ain't really fishing anymore. We stopped watching the depth finder and we were in about 8 INCHES OF WATER. But me and Ron just kept going and we made our own channel. Russ and Brent were somewhere between Panic and Hysterics. If Rick showed up he would have been at the doctors getting his nose put back!

After we fished the area we start to head back to Fisherman's Cove , we are at top speed all of 25mph. Then the front seat of one of Ricks finest rentals comes dislodged and flies back hitting me in the chest, Ron stops the boat and once again Brant and Russ to the rescue. I have also discovered that hen the seat plowed into me it buried a set of treble hooks from a Rapala into my leg.

This is the kind of sympathy you get in situations like this from BassResource.com members. Ron is calling me a big baby, Brent wants us to re-enact it for Russ to get it on Video, saying it's the sickest thing he's ever seen on the water and Russ is breaking em for me to move the seat so he can get a shot of the Rapala sticking out of my leg. The end of a perfect day

The moral of the story WHEN FISHING WITH MOOKS ALWAYS PRESUME THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT POWER BOATS AND SPEND SOME TIME TO SHOW EM HOW THINGS WORK. UNLESS YOU WANT MORE ENTERTAINMENT THAN A NIGHT AT THE BOURBON STREET FOLLIES

ADDENDUM; I fogot to add , on the first attempt out me and Ron knew nothing of the bouys marking the boat lanes, and we were out of them, pver timber and no clue.

 Glenn and Kerri are somewhat frantically waving us back into the lanes and I think they are waving to us, how we mad it over to them without a major catastophe still amazes me until this day!

[bilgerat]

Now that's  )&$#&(% hilarious

[Gatorbassman]

I still bust a gut every time I read it.

[Bassn Blvd]

I literally just peed my pants from laughing.  You should send your story to a fishing magazine for publication.

[Hookemdown.]

Muddy, are you Bill Heavey?

[Long Mike]

I had the dubious privilege of taking both Ron and Muddy out with me separately after that famous day.  They both became confident at running the trolling motor, but for some strange reason they both preferred to hold the foot pedal in their laps.  ;D ;D ;D

[Dan:]

This should be a sticky. Fo' real.

[IDbasser]

That is one of the funniest things I have read in a long time! Thanks for posting.

[drmnbig]

God, I wish I had found this place a long time ago!  That was freakin' hilarious.  

Funniest part is that I know every single one of us can relate to at least part of the story at one time or another.

[Sam]

Story sounds like a funny B movie.

Glad no one got seriously hurt.

And thank God you guys were not trying to fly and airplane.

I agree with Bassin Blvd., send it to a magazine.  

[Muddy]

I am not a fame and fortune kind of guy, this is for the fellas on the board to share a few laughs.

[Daniel A.]

I've got tears in my eyes and others in the office are wondering if I'm okay. That's possibly the funniest thing I've ever read.

I'm with Brent. If that was on video...

[SPEEDBEAD.]

You should hear him talk about it in person.

Read it to yourself in an Italian / NY accent and throw a chuckle in at every . and you will get it.   ;D

[Eddie Munster]

Good one Muddy; this SHOULD be a sticky.  ;D

[simplejoe]

that's hilarious.

TO bad it's not on video       ;D

[Jimzee]

Still never gets old, kinda like The Night Before Christmas. ;D

[TheBeast]

Y'all ain't had the Burley experience yet.   So till April this will be one of the best fishing stories I have heard.

[Muddy]

I can not wait for the day I will be blessed to spend a day fishing with Burley , That should give Mike D some footage for a Season Special :

[Matt Fly]

My cheeks hurt for hours after dark that day.

It will truly be one of the stories I tell my southern friends about some Yankees on Fork for years to come.

Muddy, you could sell that story to the Texas Fish and Game magazine, they always have funny story on the inside back page,

And it would be worth a dollar per word in my book.

By the way Dom, you isn't no Yank,   you are 100% Mook in my book. 8-)

[Muddy]

That is an honor 8-)

[Triton21]

My cheeks hurt for hours after dark that day.

It will truly be one of the stories I tell my southern friends about some Yankees on Fork for years to come.

Muddy, you could sell that story to the Texas Fish and Game magazine, they always have funny story on the inside back page,

And it would be worth a dollar per word in my book.

By the way Dom, you isn't no Yank, you are 100% Mook in my book. 8-)

Matt, I also LMAF.  You comming to KY?

[jimmieO]

I had seen this referenced so many times and now that I have read it, my life is complete. Best quote I will probably ever hear....

"the harder i press the righter we go"

wow. thank you so much for sharing again.

[DADto4]

That's too funny I loved it.

Stories like that deserve to get published.

;D

[bilgerat]

Hey Muddy - Did you at least catch any fish for all of your troubles ?

[Muddy]

Yea, and some nice ones too! The 3rd day with Long Mike, we had a blast with *** and a cove without anyother boats! That's one of them in my Avatar.