For all young dads, or soon to be

[JCrzy4Bass]

K guys, got some exciting news, however it is definately gonna affect my fishing.  And I just had a few questions for you guys on this.

My wife is now almost 12 weeks pregnant.  I can finally post this as we broke the news to our families this week and my dad (who frequents the forums) know.  So... I know my time is going to be limited fishing this year especially as we get on down to that last trimester.

I know she doesn't want me out all that much and said she'd prefer one weekend day a week which isn't that bad, and I could go out occassionally one weeknight after work if it's nice out since she has hmwk for online classes to do.

So I was just curious after the bundle of joy came, what happend to you guys as far as fishing.  I'm expecting a couple months of possibly not going out, although I know the parents said if we need "time off" or a "break" they could watch it for a while, but thats husband and wife time.  And while I know my wife likes fishing, she ain't gonna wanna do that with all our free time.

I'm thinking of compromising with her and maybe doing something that she wants the first time like going to see a play or going out to dinner or going to old town alexandria or fairfax to walk around and so forth.  And then maybe next time... fishing?

I know it's gonna take away a lot of time on the water and I can't wait til' my son or daughter is old enough to be out there with me, and only hope they love the sport as much as I do.  But how often did you guys get out?  I'm not gonna sneak around at night and leave or sneak out with the kid after daycare real quick to get casts in, but when did you find you had the time to do what you enjoy?

Years ago I quit my band after college, though we were getting really good, had really good draws, and had we another singer, everyone I heard from said we could have probably made it and got signed.  When I had to quit because my schedule I was so devastated.  Work for a living?  Or pray you make it big?  Well bass fishing filled my void.  It's what I live for.  And now I see it becoming a small piece of my life, set on the back burner.

Just trying to find out how you guys coped, what you did to make the urges and impulses go to the back of your mind.  I know I will be so focused on the kid and I'm gonna love it and that enough should make a lot of it not matter anymore.  But what else did you guys do when you looked back and just wished you could be on the water.

Appreciate any responses guys.

Ps:  I'm the happiest most anticipating daddy in the world.  I can't wait to see my kid.

[flechero]

Congratulations!!!!

I suspect that YOU will want to fish a lot less since you'll be spending such awesome quality time with your wife and new baby!!

[Cigarlover 1]

Congrats man! My wife just pasted the 6 month mark. She's due June 10th. I'll be interested in the responses also.

[JCrzy4Bass]

Of course Flech. But you mean to tell me you wouldn't get that urge in the back of your mind on occassion? I'm gonna be the best dad ever. My kid, boy or girl, is gonna love to fish, love football (although it will develop a complex, since her family likes the Steelers, I like the Broncos, my family are Pats fans, and my wife is a 49ers fan), gonna love to jam guitar, etc.

So if it's a girl... tom boy, no doubt.

Anyway I can't wait to have it arrive just because my wife and I have talked so much about what a great family we could make and how cool it would be taking the kids on trips to our old favorite places when we were young, watchin' em' get through school and make buddies, and watching em' grow up and develop such a unique personality and stuff. It's gonna be great.

I can't help but think of the first time we play catch, or I teach them how to swing a bat or field a pop up... I can't wait to see them riding around on their tricycle and then teaching em' how to ride a "big boy" bike or two wheeler.  I think of all the things my parents did with me and now I wanna pass that down and give my kids even better to pay them back.  And that way they grow up knowing they had an amazing childhood.

P:s: Congrats Cigar, I may be taking pointers from you when you get chances and seeing how you are doing and what not. Good luck!

[Popeye]

Congratulations to you and your wife. From your previous posts it sounds to me like you're on the RIGHT PATH to a great and successful parenthood!! It's a real journey, I can vouch for that x4!!

[Cigarlover 1]

P:s: Congrats Cigar, I may be taking pointers from you when you get chances and seeing how you are doing and what not. Good luck!

No problem at all, I'd be more than happy to lend you my experiences.  

[fooman]

Congrats,

fishing will be the farthest thing in your mind for a while,you'll still get out once in a while.

My daughter changed my whole life. My priorities are changed and I have a whole new outlook on life..It's the single best thing that has happened to me..

The best times I have is spending time with my daughter either fishing or exploring the woods and water,you'll see things in a differant light.

My daughters not a tomboy but she can get all dolled up for a dance recital then turn around in scrubs and hit the river looking for crawdads..

[BUCKEYEone]

You will honestly all but forget about fishing for a while.  Chances are she will get so sick of you being at home, she will say "hey, you should go fishing!"  Congrats man, thats great news, and have fun with it for sure!  Experience says if you baby her and sympathize every time she is mad/uncomfortable/crazy during the pregnancy she will thank you 1000Xs over after the baby comes and her sanity returns!

[JCrzy4Bass]

Buck you read me to a tee man.  I do that religiously.  I'm there for her all the time.  She's had crucial morning sickness in the evening.  It sucks to see her get home and feel like crap every night but I give her the good ole foot rub, back massage, shoulder massage whenever I can and even draw the bath or shower for her and I always ask if I can pick anything up for her on the way home.

[grimlin]

It's gonna effect your fishing alot! Of course you'll still be able to go,just not as much. Being there will be your most important though. She is right however,once your family and you get a routine you will be able to set up family outing and just have a joy.

But for now,cut your trips short and be there for your lady...you'll get kicked out once in awhile so have a rod and reel handy...lol

PS my little one is now 3 years old...Will try to get him with me once in awhile to go fishing.

[Olebiker]

It sucks to see her get home and feel like crap every night but I give her the good ole foot rub, back massage, shoulder massage whenever I can and even draw the bath or shower for her and I always ask if I can pick anything up for her on the way home.

Take it from a guy who has been married for 37 years: You are doing things right.  Keep looking for ways to help make her life a little easier and you will have more than enough time for fishing with her blessing.

[Grey Wolf]

It sounds to me that you have got your priorities in order.

First came love' then came marriage , then came the baby carriage.

Believe me fishing can definately take a back seat to this glorious occasion.

[slomoe]

Congrats J!

[=Matt 5.0=]

K dude, I'm gonna tell you how it was for me, honestly. Everyone that knows me (LBH, Tin, my buddy Rick) they know I have it made. My wife let's me go where I want, when I want. But you have to compromise.

For the first few months your new baby will be all about Mommy. It was very hard for me to bond with my son. As a newborn they just take, take, take. You will be sleep deprived and grouchy. Don't take it out on each other. You're a team and you have to play as a team to get through it. My son was born in the middle of September, and I still fished one day a weekend, mostly Saturdays. We are pretty much always on the water by 3-4 am, and home by noon.

Now that my little guy is 18 months old, and has such a cute little personality it is the best thing in the world. It's the first few months that are the hardest. At least it was for us. We have been together for 12 years, than suddenly there's "someone else" and it's a huge adjustment. Just be patient, if you have to, jump in the car and go for a ride instead of getting frustrated. Worked for me. Good luck!  

[Micro]

Congrats, man.  You need to start planning on how to introduce you son or daughter to fishing.   You ought to have a plan in place by the end of the second trimester.  

[JCrzy4Bass]

Matt, some great advice dude.  I have heard similar things from other people.  I appreciate it.

Micro, trust me I am gonna have a zebco rod and reel combo with all the extras stashed away before the kid is born.  Then when its old enough to hold it... it's on!  Lol.

My dad already said he hopes it's a girl because we can teach her how to fish and with the many open spots on the womens tour it would be easier for her to break into the sport lol.  He's crazy.  First thing out of his mouth when we told him was it's gonna be on the tour, no doubt lol.

We just laughed.  I think he's gonna have a fun time playing grandpa, and if he does half the things he did for me when I was young this kid is gonna have the best family in the world.

I really thank you guys for all the kind words, support, and advice.  I am actually gonna print out this thread later on and save it stashed away somewhere so I have it to refer to if I get in a jam and just need to stop and think stuff over for a second.  I don't know how I'd survive without this place.  You guys are all the best!

[BUCKEYEone]

J-  You'll have a blast, boy or girl.  It is tough when the baby is in the mommy stages, my son has been that way for 11 months!  Its a lot of fun though, no matter how frustrating it can be at times.  You sound like you are headed in the right direction, just enjoy the ride!

[Dan:]

Congrats, man, that's awesome!

[GatorBK]

Congrats , I feel so sorry for my wife with the morning sickness she is over 6 months and still ocassionally gets sick.

My wife and I are having our first child due date is May 23, I am fortunate though my wife loves to fish and is also a licenced Nuisance gator trapper like me so we will be going to the outdoors a lot of fishing and getting gators. I guess our child has already been gator hunting ;D she got one the other evening when we went out . And a few earlier on in her pregnancy

our sonogram pics we want the gender to be a surprise

Our babys first gator My wife was about 3 months along when she got this one.

[Kimbro]

J and others expecting. First and foremost, congrats on the additions. Kids will turn your world upside down. You will be amazed at how much you can love one thing. Fishing will take a back seat but the urge will still be there. Cater to your moms-to-be and it will pay off big time later. Getting out on the water is still possible but try a little harder to schedule your fishing time in advance. Your significant other will appreciate your efforts, responsibility and respect for her.

My baby girl is 18 months old and everyday that we spend together is a blessing. Her smile and laugh melts my heart every time.

Take the time before your baby comes to focus on your relationship with your significant other because times will be stressful for the first few months.  You will have to give 110% to keep your relationship happy and healthy for the first few months. Remember, everything's a learning experience.  If you need anything or have any questions your friends here on BR are only a quick PM away.

Again Congrats

Joe

[hjerk24]

Congrats.  I have a 21 month old girl, and she is already carrying around her Barbie rod.  She pulls the rubber fish, and I pretend that I have a big one on as she pulls out the drag.  It is tough, and especially financially to find the time and money to fish.  I think compromise is the key.  If she has things she can do with friends , etc.., then it hopefully won't be a problem when you want to hit the water.  This site is great as well, because there are so many guys that may be able to get together and fish with you, and save gas, and or fishing "money".  If you ever need someone to head down that way and fish the Potomac, PM me, and I come a hauling the bass boat.  Congrats, and good luck.  Being a dad is the most amazing experience ever.  I know that lauren, my daughter weighed 7lb. 11oz. and I said pretty close after she was born, that she would be a great keeper for any tournament.  What a fish she has turned out to be, teaching me way more than she knows.  Good luck, and good fishing.

Jamie Bosler

Boyertown, Pa.

[Low_Budget_Hooker]

Excellent News!!  Good luck

[Alpster]

This will probably get me in trouble, but I can't resist posting this because I think it is so important. When both of my girls were born, (now 24 and 16) my family has always had a very close church family. I honestly don't know how anyone faces the world without it. There was always other ladies around helping out. When my wife died with brain cancer (my youngest was 9 and oldest in high school) my oldest daughter was homeschooling and had more than a year to go. Several ladies in my church stepped up to help her finish high school. She just recently graduated from Rutgers with honors. Every Mother's day, my youngest buys flowers or cards for all the women in the church because they all became 'stand in' moms when her mom died. When I leave in the bassbuss heading to Guntersville, my youngest daughter will be staying with one or another church member every night while I'm gone, and I don't have to worry about a thing. Otherwise, I could not go, period.

That's just one short story about how having a healthy church family has blessed my life. I could tell you a 1000 more.  Just something to consider for a young family getting started. CONGRATULATIONS! No matter what you are thinking now, NOTHING (not even fishing) beats being a daddy!

Keep on keeping on!

Ronnie