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Guest the_muddy_man
Posted

few more from the mudvault:

Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.  After the sixth one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat."

   Little Johnny replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

   The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"

   Little Johnny answered, "No, he minded his own business!"

A grade school teacher in Tennessee asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his sheep. It was fascinating."

    The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating."

    Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to Graceland and I was fascinated."

    The teacher said, "Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinated."

    Little Johnny raised his hand.  The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate', so she called on him.

    Little Johnny said, "My Aunt Gina has a shirt with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight."

    The teacher cried.

Teachers never give up, and neither does Little Johnny. She asks him, "Can you name the Great Lakes?"

   You know Johnny, he is always fast with an answer, and he pipes up with, "I don't need to. They've already been named."

Posted

 Man, in 58 years I sure wish I had a nickel for everytime I heard how Little Johnny got over on someone. Usually his poor suffering teacher ;D

                                                    As Ever,

                                                     Skillet

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