Best Comedy on the Lake

[Deb]

Have you ever been out fishing and the fish weren't cooperating?  And happened onto the best comedy show around and basically for free.  We finally got a couple of hours on Ky Lake this afternoon.  While fishing down a bank we came upon a public ramp.  (Not really a surprise we live right across from it.)(Usually good for SEVERAL bass)  There was a steady stream of people coming out of a motor home, must have been at least 42 of them.  Out of state tags, this may be good.  Two fellows from the group are backing in two boats.  First one completely blocks both sides of the ramp.  It must have taken at least 15 min to get the boat in the water.  A lady was holding the rope to pull the boat up but of course they continued to block the ramp.  After they finally get in the next group proceeds, well some of them.  It started with 2 people, again the one driving the truck was also the only one that could drive the boat.  Again several attempts before getting the boat wet.  The second boat yells to the 1st...Did you put the plug in?.....First boat leaves, second makes it to the dock.  Here comes 3 more people to join in.  There were rods sticking out everywhere.  The older gentleman who obviously knew exactly what was going on, was giving orders like crazy.  You get that life jacket, no not that one the one under it.  No the other one under it.  People were fumbling around like a bunch of squirrels.  Now, this was a small boat maybe 14 ft.  All of the life jackets were the big bulky orange things.  One younger guy was on the dock, trying to hold the boat and assist all the squirrels.  Suddenly he yells, wait, lets get the tire out.  Tire, in the boat.  Yes, of course, that's what I've been doing wrong all these years.  I've been forgetting to take a spare tire out fishing with me.  You know, just in case.  I'm sitting there trying not to fall out of the boat or get myself whipped for laughing at these folks.  Steadily backing our boat away from the boatload of squirrels. Who knows whats gonna happen when they try to drive it.  The younger fellow heads back to the motorhome complete with the tire, a license plate, and a HUGE dipnet.  Finally they all got loaded in, and headed out, wide open straight to the back of the bay.  A very shallow bay.  We hear the older guy yell to the first boat,  come on, I hear the crappie that are biting are in two ft of water.  Just as they ride off into the sunset comes a truck pulling a pontoon boat.  Woman and child get in the boat, man backs them in.  Good no problem.  I'm thinking, cool another female that can drive a boat.  He keeps backing in.  Nothing happens.  The boat doesn't budge.  He backs up more.  By now the bed of the truck has water in it.  I'm thinking, ok get ready...you're gonna need those nursing skills soon.  Real Soon! The woman goes to the front of the boat, sits down and tries to shove the boat off.  He's yelling get in the #@*% boat!  After yelling this 3 or 4 times,  She gets up, he takes off.  Up the ramp.  I thought she was gonna fly out the back of the pontoon.  He gets out, checks the strap, yep, it's still hooked up.  Hey, he's checking the back tie downs.  Yep, they're right where they are supposed to be...When traveling.  Ok, unhook them.  You can do it.  I'm sitting there in total amazement as to how these folks can manage to pull the boats without totaling them out or killing someone.  Much less be on the lake.  Finally, the ramp is clear.  I troll up and we start casting.  Nothing.  Not even a nibble.  Guess maybe the bass are still laughing at all the squirrels.  

My husband had never been around boats much less had one till he married me 2 yrs ago.  He's learning, fast.  He backs the boat in but hasn't yet learned how to drive it or the trolling motor. He has been surprized to see some of the sights we've seen.

I'm sitting there enjoying being on the water and letting my jaws quit aching when my husband says.  "Dear, when we get home, would you get online and see if Bass Pro has one of those tires for our boat and while your at it, be sure and get a jack to go with it"!  Ok, it's time to go home...

[tipptruck1]

Ok I think they Qualify for mooks of the year. But that had to be great to watch. I have only been around boats for a few months. When me and my buddy go out we can have the boat launched in just a few minnutes.

[cart7t]

Watching the action on public boat ramps can provide hours of entertainment.  It's best not to think about the fact that these same clueless idiots are going to be sharing the same body of water as you.  I've always wondered why they don't have launch ramp workers like they have at golf courses to speed up play.  You get 5 minutes max to back in and launch a boat or you have to go back to the end of the line.

Hmmm... Could be a good way to make a few bucks on the weekend.  Stand around busy boat ramps and hire yourself out for $20 to get them in the water in 5 minutes or less.  

[Low_Budget_Hooker]

Muddy man,...I wish you would have told me you were going to Kentucky, I've been wanting to get down there for awhile now.  I even have my own tire that I use when I fly to the southern states.

Mom--AWESOME story,...Them squirrels are nuts

[frogtog]

Never go to the ramp without the video recorder. ;D

[tallydude]

Now all of you see why I moved away. ;D

[RecMar8541]

Not a comedy but boat ramp reality none the less...

Some years ago my Dad and I were sitting on the Breakwall at cedar lake in Indiana having lunch.

Guy pulls up with 2 little kids (under 5) and a 14 foot jon boat.

The wind was HOWLING!!  Waves just beating the shore.

They launch and he leaves the 2 kids to hold the boat!!  No life vests nothing.  Little girl in the boat, little boy on dock, both holding on for dear life.

Well the boat got away and in his attempt to hold on little man goes in the drink, about 6 feet deep, and hits his melon on the way in on the side of the boat.  Their Dad was just staring in disbelief.  I jumped over my Dad, ran down the dock and belly flopped on the deck and grabbed the little kids sweatshirt and yanked him back up on the dock...the whole time the boat is drifting away, and the father is slack jawed.  

I jumped in the lake and grabbed the lead rope for the boat (why he didnt just tie it to the dock Ill never know)  swam back and hauled the little girl in with the boat.

I was probably 14 at the time, and my dad says....in his usual fashion...."wish you moved that fast when you was doin chores!" hahahahaha

Basically that guy won the heres your sign award.

[Deb]

You're right, it is reality.  Scarry...I think when I order our tire and jack, I'll see if BP has "signs" as well.  They're probably out of them.  They seem to be in great demand.  The weather is predicted to be absolutely beautiful this weekend.  Ky Lake will covered up.  I think I'll unload some of the tackle and make room for the camcorder, camera, tire, jack, signs and a big first aid kit!  Maybe even add Ace bandages to wrap around our ribs.  Look out squirrels, I'm watching............................Get ready bass, here we come!!!!!!