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In the days of the Wild West there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the greatest gunfighter in the world. He practiced every minute of his spare time, but he knew he wasn't yet first-rate, and that there must be  something he was doing wrong.

Sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, he recognized an elderly man seated at the bar that had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the West, in his day.

The young cowboy took the seat next to the old-timer, bought him a drink, and told him the story of his real ambition. "Do you think you could give me some tips?" he asked.

The old man looked him up and down, and said, "Well for one thing, you're wearing your gun way too high, tie the holster a little lower down on your leg".

The young man did as he was told, stood up whipped out his 45 and shot the bow tie off the piano player.

"That's terrific!!" said the cowboy. "Got any more tips for me?"

"Yep", said the old man, "cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it. That'll give you a smoother draw."

The young man took out his knife, cut a notch, stood up, drew his gun, and in a blur, shot a cufflink off the piano players shirt.

"WOW" said the cowboy, "I'm learning something here, got any more tips?"

The old man pointed to a large can in the corner of the saloon. "See that grease over there? Coat your gun with it."

The young many went over to the can, and smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.

"No", said the old-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun - handle and all."

"Will that make me a better gunfighter?", asked the young man.

"No", said the old timer, "but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano, he's gonna shove it up your butt and it won't hurt so much."

  • Super User
Posted

Rollin' rollin' rollin' his butt sure will be swollin', rollin' rollin' rollin', rawhide!  ;D

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