Peer Pressure

[BassKing813]

Ok guys, I need some advice. I'm 17yrs old and a senior in high school, and for the past three years I have managed to resist pressure from my friends to go to parties and drink. But I'm finding that it's even tougher this year. Everyone keeps telling me I should go drink with them. I don't know why, but I just don't think it's a good idea, and sitting around getting drunk only to puke my guts out and wake up with a severe headache the next day just doesn't seem that appealing. I'd like to think of myself as being able to resist such pressure but I don't know if I can hold out any longer. Parties are a big deal at my school and drinking is just "the cool thing to do" if you want to become more popular and have more friends. I'm afraid if I go to one of these parties and get drunk I will do something really embarassing, because who knows what I might do if I get drunk, I've only had two drops of beer in my whole life (which by the way tasted gross). What do you think I should do? Should I live it up a little and start drinking (I'm practically an adult), or should I continue to make people think I'm not as social as everyone else by not partying and drinking?

[Cajun1977]

you can   go to the parties  and not drink         dont let anyone pressure you into doing something you dont want to do   i think you are very wise  in being your own man         i do drink  but id never try to make anyone drink that did not want to        stay strong in your beleifs      try to go and just have a good time          you wont miss out on anything if you dont drink  but   i do beleive   in the future you will wish you had gone to a party or two   just have fun    and remember were always here for support good luck

[BassKing813]

you can go to the parties and not drink       dont let anyone pressure you into doing something you dont want to do i think you are very wise in being your own man       i do drink but id never try to make anyone drink that did not want to       stay strong in your beleifs      try to go and just have a good time       you wont miss out on anything if you dont drink but i do beleive in the future you will wish you had gone to a party or two just have fun and remember were always here for support good luck

Only problem is I have always been kind of reserved and self-conscious. If I go and don't drink I will be nervous and not know what to do with myself, but if I were to have just one drink it might lighten me up just enough so I can be relaxed and not think so much about what others think of me.

[bassnleo]

Ok guys, I need some advice. I'm 17yrs old and a senior in high school, and for the past three years I have managed to resist pressure from my friends to go to parties and drink. But I'm finding that it's even tougher this year. Everyone keeps telling me I should go drink with them. I don't know why, but I just don't think it's a good idea, and sitting around getting drunk only to puke my guts out and wake up with a severe headache the next day just doesn't seem that appealing. I'd like to think of myself as being able to resist such pressure but I don't know if I can hold out any longer. Parties are a big deal at my school and drinking is just "the cool thing to do" if you want to become more popular and have more friends. I'm afraid if I go to one of these parties and get drunk I will do something really embarassing, because who knows what I might do if I get drunk, I've only had two drops of beer in my whole life (which by the way tasted gross). What do you think I should do? Should I live it up a little and start drinking (I'm practically an adult), or should I continue to make people think I'm not as social as everyone else by not partying and drinking?

STAY STRONG, continue to resist the pressure.

This reminder and advice is coming to you from a Police Officer and D.A.R.E. instructor for the last 12 years.

Your first drinking night could be your last, keep that in mind. Many teens don't make it home due to accidents etc.. from a night of illegal drinking.

If your "friends" don't understand that you have choosen to stay sober than it may be time to start hanging out with different people.

What would your parents think or do if they caught you drinking or the police brought you home at 2:00 AM drunk?

All the trust you have built between you and your parents would be gone, plus you'll feel alot worse, alot longer, than a hangover would last.

I wish I could say more. I could go on for hours with stories of what alcohol has done to many young lives that I've had contact with while on the job.

It's hard being your age. Maybe find a friend who has the same beliefs about alcohol use as you and talk to them, a school counselor could also help you.

Good luck and STAY STRONG.

[Dan:]

let me give you this advice. I am now 19 years old and a sophomore in college. Up until my junior year of high school, I didn't drink. Then I started to drink and go to parties. It was awesome for a while, but then in the summer after graduation, a party I was at got busted. I was charged with underage possession of alcohol. The case ended up being dismissed but I had to go to ASAP (basically a drugs and alcohol class) for 20 hours and I had to do 30 hours of community service. I also had to stay out of trouble and now I don't have my "first offense" defense if I ever get in trouble again. This was especially bad because I may end up going into a career field where I would need security clearance and that is hard to get with a criminal record.

What I learned was that the trouble I got in and the worry and cost and time I had to spend to get out of trouble was not worth it. Sure the parties were fun and all, and drinking had its benefits (it got easier to talk to people and I "fit in" more. But the bottom line is this: you can still go to parties and have fun with your friends who are drinking. I'm pretty sure that in most places you can't get in trouble if you are at a party as long as you haven't been drinking. Don't feel the need to drink, you don't have to. Parties can be fun without being drunk, and if people make fun of you for not drinking, just think how good it will feel if those jerks get in trouble and you don't. Also, everyone appreciates a sober person to give rides from the party.

[carySE406]

I'm afraid if I go to one of these parties and get drunk I will do something really embarassing, because who knows what I might do if I get drunk,

I know a kid that gave in and went to a party to drink, he ended up getting in a fight, breaking his nose and then passed out in the bathroom and hit his head on the toliet, getting a concussion.  If you are going to drink it is better to not do it at a party and definatly not if you are driving.  But that is your decision....

[BassKing813]

Ok guys, I need some advice. I'm 17yrs old and a senior in high school, and for the past three years I have managed to resist pressure from my friends to go to parties and drink. But I'm finding that it's even tougher this year. Everyone keeps telling me I should go drink with them. I don't know why, but I just don't think it's a good idea, and sitting around getting drunk only to puke my guts out and wake up with a severe headache the next day just doesn't seem that appealing. I'd like to think of myself as being able to resist such pressure but I don't know if I can hold out any longer. Parties are a big deal at my school and drinking is just "the cool thing to do" if you want to become more popular and have more friends. I'm afraid if I go to one of these parties and get drunk I will do something really embarassing, because who knows what I might do if I get drunk, I've only had two drops of beer in my whole life (which by the way tasted gross). What do you think I should do? Should I live it up a little and start drinking (I'm practically an adult), or should I continue to make people think I'm not as social as everyone else by not partying and drinking?

STAY STRONG, continue to resist the pressure.

This reminder and advice is coming to you from a Police Officer and D.A.R.E. instructor for the last 12 years.

Your first drinking night could be your last, keep that in mind. Many teens don't make it home due to accidents etc.. from a night of illegal drinking.

If your "friends" don't understand that you have choosen to stay sober than it may be time to start hanging out with different people.

What would your parents think or do if they caught you drinking or the police brought you home at 2:00 AM drunk?

All the trust you have built between you and your parents would be gone, plus you'll feel alot worse, alot longer, than a hangover would last.

I wish I could say more. I could go on for hours with stories of what alcohol has done to many young lives that I've had contact with while on the job.

It's hard being your age. Maybe find a friend who has the same beliefs about alcohol use as you and talk to them, a school counselor could also help you.

Good luck and STAY STRONG.

My friends have been respectful of my decision for the past three years, but they keep saying it's my senior year and if I don't learn how to party and drink, when I go to college and drink for the first time everyone will laugh. Basically, my friends tell me that drinking a little bit but not enough to get drunk would be fine and I would "loosen up." I don't know what to do. I'm kind of nervous about trying it anyway, but I don't know. Even a member of my family asked me if I wanted to try a beer.

[BassKing813]

let me give you this advice. I am now 19 years old and a sophomore in college. Up until my junior year of high school, I didn't drink. Then I started to drink and go to parties. It was awesome for a while, but then in the summer after graduation, a party I was at got busted. I was charged with underage possession of alcohol. The case ended up being dismissed but I had to go to ASAP (basically a drugs and alcohol class) for 20 hours and I had to do 30 hours of community service. I also had to stay out of trouble and now I don't have my "first offense" defense if I ever get in trouble again. This was especially bad because I may end up going into a career field where I would need security clearance and that is hard to get with a criminal record.

What I learned was that the trouble I got in and the worry and cost and time I had to spend to get out of trouble was not worth it. Sure the parties were fun and all, and drinking had its benefits (it got easier to talk to people and I "fit in" more. But the bottom line is this: you can still go to parties and have fun with your friends who are drinking. I'm pretty sure that in most places you can't get in trouble if you are at a party as long as you haven't been drinking. Don't feel the need to drink, you don't have to. Parties can be fun without being drunk, and if people make fun of you for not drinking, just think how good it will feel if those jerks get in trouble and you don't. Also, everyone appreciates a sober person to give rides from the party.

What else do people do at these parties besides drink? I'd probably end up sitting by myself having a bad time.

[bassnleo]

I guess it's like this:

You have a very difficult decision to make. You can solicit advise from every member here and probably get alot of input to consider but it all boils down to one thing, WHAT DO YOU WANT?

That crap about going to college and drinking for the first time, well, you'll still be underage. The same consequences can still happen. Just because your in college dosen't give you the green light to drink.

As I and someone else previously said, 1 night of underage drinking can ruin plans you may have for the future or worse.

I personally know many people whom have had to change majors because they got caught drinking and could not have ANY alcohol offenses on their record. I recently had a 19 year old, home on break, that got caught drinking, tried to run, fell over an embankment drunk and broke his leg. He was on scholarship for athletics. Important word in that sentence, WAS. His funding got pulled...

Man, I seriously feel for you. Your decision is not easy. How do you know if you will be able to "drink a little"? Once you drink a little it will lower your inhibitions and your friends will easily talk you into drinking more, then who knows? You may get laughed at anyway because you made an A$$ out of yourself. Choosing not to drink dosen't make you any less social.

Don't let someone else make your decision for you. If your nervous about drinking and don't want to, then don't. Come next year you'll have all new friends at college and what you are being talked into doing will not even matter.

[Bass XL]

dude, i would just drink a soda if i were you...if someone keeps naggin you about "hey drink!" and you just keep saying no....eventually they wont waste their time on you and they will go on doing whatever.....thats my personal experiance

[BassKing813]

Thanks for the advice guys. For now, I will continue to try and resist the urge. Besides, if I came home from a party and had been drinking, my parents would definitely know, even if I wasn't drunk. I'd be grounded for a very long time.

[BucketmouthAngler13]

Well if you dont want to drink, dont go to a party. Thats like not wanting to buy anything, and going into BPS.  It just doesnt work.

And besides, you cant be the only one in the school who doesn't go out drinking. If some one trys to make you drink, buy telling you "oh they will make fun of you at collage" then why would you want to be their friend anyway?

Just keep on keeping on.

[KU_Bassmaster.]

I am not going to say ..... yay or nay ..... That's your decision.  Just be aware of the consequences and should you chose to drink ..... BE RESPONSIBLE about it.  That means NO DRIVING.  Calling Mom or Dad for a ride home and being grounded is a hell of a lot better than being in jail, the hospital, or even dead.

[Top]

bump loosening up... you are who you are and if your friends can't accept you for that then find new friends... If you are finding yourself wanting to drink at parties... don't go to parties... the consequences outweigh being "cool" trust me... I don't know how many Privates got into trouble when they got to Germany for their first tour... they just couldn't handle it...

IF you do go to a party... have a soda...tell everyone.. "I know it sucks but I am the designated driver tonight" that way you will have something in your hand and an out for not drinking... and you can make fun of the idiots that get hammered and act like an ***... trust me the girls will like you soooo much more than the idiot that acts like a drunk monkey... just be yourself... and pull the hotties ...

AL

[flechero]

You mentioned being socially uncomfortable several times... think of it this way, if you don't drink, you won't make a fool of yourself around the ladies, you won't get sick, you won't get arrested, and you probably won't kill anyone in a drunk driving accident. Do you need any more incentive to not break the law???

I have a good friend who doesn't drink, never did... he is the life of the party and always the most popular with the ladies... and the added bonus for all his friends is that he is always the designated driver. A friend who doesn't drink is a good friend to have around, your friends will realize that sooner or later. I wish I had been the one who didn't drink when I was younger...

[IllinoisBasser]

Just tell your "Friends" that you are allergic to alcohol. I had a friend in college that didn't drink.

He was a popular guy with us ( Designated Driver). When I was in school, this was 13 years ago mind you. One of my classmates was a straight A student going into his Junior year, his goal was to go to an Ivy League school. His " Friends" decided to get loaded before school, he joined the party too. All 3 of them got loaded and tried to attend class. all 3 of them got busted, not only by school officials, the police got involved as well. That guy never made it to an Ivy League school. Being a Designated Driver has perks too. Think of all the lovely ladies attending the party who will need a ride home because the person who drove them is either passed out or puking in the bushes.

                                   Drunken Dummy = 0

     

                                                     You = Pimp Daddy

[Hillbilly_Hooker]

Pink Floyd,

Stay strong and resist the urge to join your friends.  When I was way too young, I used to think drinking was cool too.  Fortunately, a friend of mine convinced me to join the local volunteer rescue squad.  After witnessing far too many deaths and injuries because of car accidents with drunk drivers, the innocent wives that were abused by drunken husbands, lives ruined, careers ruined, lives ended... I didn't think it was so cool anymore.  

Now that I'm 47 and the father of three grown daughters, I've seen them suffer the pain of losing close friends that were killed in accidents... all from being drunk.  

No matter what your friends think, it isn't cool.  They'll eventually come to learn that too... if it isn't too late.

Hillbilly

[.ghoti.]

I'll relate a story, just for you, young man.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, ( back when I was your age ) a fellow high school student, a couple of years older, got drunk, went on a road trip, crashed and burned, killing himself and four others. One young man survived as a total invalid. The drivers father, a man a few words, insisted that the casket be open at the funeral. Many of us attended. None of us ever forgot what he looked like. It was the worst thing I've ever seen. I can still see him, in my mind, 34 years later. I almost wish I could send you a picture. It would make your decision, up to this point, to not drink look like pure genius. Stick to your guns, buddy. It sounds like you are being wise beyond your years.

Besides, what's so cool about being drunk?

You can stumble around, fall down and slur your stupid comments. The ladies really go for that.

You can puke, over and over. Now that's a real turn on.

You can wet your pants, or worse. That'll have the young lovelies lining up to hang with you.

You can pass out. Go to a party some time just to see what happens to the ones who pass out. It's real hoot.

You can end up in jail. There are a lot of weird, misguided women around the country, writing nice letters to convicts. I'm sure you can hook up with one of them.

Or you can end up dead. enough said.

It's all up to you, man. Just remember, what ever you do, don't drive a car when you've been drinking. Don't get in the car with other drunks either.

Good luck,

GK

[Siebert Outdoors]

I'm not going to post up here why you should/shouldnt give in to peer pressure or drink.

My opinion is dont do it but my main reason of posting is.

Please do not ever drink and drive.  It is never a good idea.

[Valascus]

My friends have been respectful of my decision for the past three years, but they keep saying it's my senior year and if I don't learn how to party and drink, when I go to college and drink for the first time everyone will laugh. Basically, my friends tell me that drinking a little bit but not enough to get drunk would be fine and I would "loosen up." I don't know what to do. I'm kind of nervous about trying it anyway, but I don't know. Even a member of my family asked me if I wanted to try a beer.

Be sure to tell your friends while you are doing well in your college classes and NOT PARTYING, and they are all struggling to do well while they all drink to excess and killing brain cells, who is laughing now. Take my advice...parting in college is a HORRIBLE idea. You are there to study and do well for yourself and your future. Not to drink and party. Take that from a guy who unfortunately did just that and ended up $20,000+ in debt in student loans with no degree to show for it. Try your hardest to resist this peer pressure. It all starts with that.

[edbassmaster]

These are not your friends if they are tring to get you to do something you dont want to do. First and foremost...if you drink you are breaking the law. There is no such thing as drinking responsibly if you are breaking the law, PERIOD. There is so much more to life than drinking. Besides drinking, whether you agree or disagree, is a gateway drug that can lead to smoking pot, and even worse. Do yourself a huge favor, stay away from the parties and make your parents, and us, proud of you!!

[tallydude]

I am not going to say ..... yay or nay ..... That's your decision. Just be aware of the consequences and should you chose to drink ..... BE RESPONSIBLE about it. That means NO DRIVING. Calling Mom or Dad for a ride home and being grounded is a hell of a lot better than being in jail, the hospital, or even dead.

I totally agree with KU (except for his choice in basketball team  ). When you're ready to start drinking, you'll know. But you can't do it for anyone else. YOU have to make the decisions that affect YOUR LIFE.

[Captain Underpants]

Way to go, Pinkfloyd- not many can resist that long. I'm not anti-alcohol (sp.?), I simply know that you must be 21 to legally drink (I think, that's from my small legal knowledge; tell me if I'm wrong), and I don't know a single person who went to a party, drank, and didn't have any trouble. I know it is incredibly difficult, but its the right thing. Plus, jail is often where party-drinkers end up-that or killed in a wreck or fight.

I'll be praying for you.

-Bait

[Guest avid]

sitting around getting drunk only to puke my guts out and wake up with a severe headache the next day just doesn't seem that appealing

Really??? What's not to like?

Seriously, while it's true there are many horrors associated with drinking at any age. The fact is that most people drink to one extent or another. I'd gues that most members of this forum indulged in some underaged drinking without getting arrested or in a car wreck.

No, it's not fear that should drive your decision. You don't like to drink, but like most young people are very sensative to peer pressure.

I suspect that you are not telling your friends in a firm way, that you are not going to drink. When they say something like "C'mon man, it's cool, everybody does it" you may be "well, maybe I'll try a little" or something similar that just encourages your friends to apply more pressure.

Tell them what you said here. Your idea of a good time is not getting drunk and puking your guts out. Then tell them how lucky they are to have you as a designated driver. Then make sure that they understand you don't want to hear it anymore. You have made your decision and they need to respect that.

Some will, some might not. It will let you know who your true friends really are.

Good luck.

[Steve-O]

Congratulations on making it that long... I see you live in Gainesville which I know from living in Orlando all my life, there is A LOT of people drinking there.  Just do whatever makes you happy and who cares what other people think about it.