Bank fishing version of AITAH

[RDB]

2 hours ago, CrashVector said:

But two incidents with two hotheads in two weeks made me look at it and go "Could it be ME?" Or "Do people just think I look like a pushover or something" etc...so I figured I'd ask here for others' opinions.

Unfortunately there seems to be this unspoken hierarchy on lakes today:

Pleasure boats > bass boats > kayaks > bank fishermen and they are all ruled by the jet ski.  Most boat people who would suggest a bank fisherman ignore the encroaching kayaker would blow a gasket if they were getting buzzed by a jet ski.  If you are unwilling to make others aware, you might as well go back to pond hopping.

 

Edit:  I call BS to 90% of these holier-than-thou posts.  The other guy followed him to his truck, stepped to him multiple times, and Crash was a kindergartner for telling the other guy what would happen if he started something…not a threat, a warning.  The guy was confronting him at his truck.  Sure there are options…fetal position, flee, buy him a cup of coffee.  It sounds like a warning was an option for Crash and it worked…the situation was de-escalated.  It’s also nice to know that if I can find all your honey holes I can have them to myself.

[T-Billy]

On 4/8/2022 at 8:29 PM, newapti5 said:

I once talked to an acquaintance who fishes catfish from the bank a lot. He told me that scenario happened to him so many times, now he's always packing while fishing. 

 

Anglers are pretty sensitive when it comes to this. I am not saying I am a saint, but I always chose to walk away, no need to escalate the situation.  There're plenty of other spots to fish; he/she can have that one. 

The fact that I'm always carrying has helped me to mellow. I've never been one to shy away from a fight, but the fact that now if a situation goes south it's probably gonna go WAAYYY south has caused me to check my ego and consider the gravity of the situation. Say whatever ignorant crap you want to me. I don't care. I'll probably get a chuckle out of it. Cut me off going down a bank, or in traffic..... I won't say a word. There's not much that's worth fighting about when the fight's likely to end up with someone in the dirt.

 

[DitchPanda]

 Lots of guys on here talking crap about guys carrying a firearm. First thing, I never saw anybody post that they would use said firearm because somebody rolled up on their fishing spot..its not about that...its about a guy rolling up on you in your spot trying to make a physical altercation happen. Don't underestimate how aggressive and stupid the other guy can and will be.

 Oh and second thing, its easy to judge somebody when you don't live where they live or understand the things they deal with. I grew up in Houston in the 90s...at that time Harris county was one of the most dangerous places in the country. Car jacking, robbery, gang beatings, serial killings...you name it. You have two choices living in a situation like that: have a means of protecting yourself or become a statistic because guns are dumb.

[jbsoonerfan]

[BrianMDTX]

Yesterday I was paddling my inflatable boat back to my recovery point. Just as I got there, a bank angler casted a spinnerbait about 98% across the pond. I halted and waited until he was about finished his retrieve, then asked him if could cross in front of him to get my boat out. He said “sure”.  
 

I guess it would have been interesting if he said “no”. But politeness and courtesy ruled the day. That day. These days, you’ll never know what goober you might cross paths with. 

[DitchPanda]

11 hours ago, RDB said:

Unfortunately there seems to be this unspoken hierarchy on lakes today:

Pleasure boats > bass boats > kayaks > bank fishermen and they are all ruled by the jet ski.  Most boat people who would suggest a bank fisherman ignore the encroaching kayaker would blow a gasket if they were getting buzzed by a jet ski.  If you are unwilling to make others aware, you might as well go back to pond hopping.

 

Edit:  I call BS to 90% of these holier-than-thou posts.  The other guy followed him to his truck, stepped to him multiple times, and Crash was a kindergartner for telling the other guy what would happen if he started something…not a threat, a warning.  The guy was confronting him at his truck.  Sure there are options…fetal position, flee, buy him a cup of coffee.  It sounds like a warning was an option for Crash and it worked…the situation was de-escalated.  It’s also nice to know that if I can find all your honey holes I can have them to myself.

Ha yeah like somehow because of the times we live we aren't allowed to protect ourselves. Guy walks up to you with a knife and says give me your wallet..instead of pulling your gun your supposed to say yes sir here's my wallet...oh and I threw in my truck keys and the deed to my house as well...anything else I can get you?

[GreenPig]

13 hours ago, DitchPanda said:

 Lots of guys on here talking crap about guys carrying a firearm. First thing, I never saw anybody post that they would use said firearm because somebody rolled up on their fishing spot..its not about that...its about a guy rolling up on you in your spot trying to make a physical altercation happen. Don't underestimate how aggressive and stupid the other guy can and will be.

 Oh and second thing, its easy to judge somebody when you don't live where they live or understand the things they deal with. I grew up in Houston in the 90s...at that time Harris county was one of the most dangerous places in the country. Car jacking, robbery, gang beatings, serial killings...you name it. You have two choices living in a situation like that: have a means of protecting yourself or become a statistic because guns are dumb.

Exactly. Some folks like living with blinders strapped tightly upon their head so they can't see what's actually taking place around them. 

[CrashVector]

12 hours ago, jbsoonerfan said:

 

 

Personally, I take it as a compliment lol..I AM a tough guy

[r83srock]

Man, it’s just fishing. I think rude people need to be told, after that just walk away.  
 

There’s certainly a time I would not have handled what you experienced, well at all. Im at a point where I let things go.

 

Yesterday my wife and I experienced something that was pretty unsettling. We were walking on a trail paralleled to a road in our town. Two teenagers were on bikes on the road and a driver of a truck got very close to one of the young boys, squealing his tires. Well the truck got to the stop sign and waited, and the two boys were real upset. The one boy picked up a rock and rod towards the truck, and the driver steps out. My wife goes, oh my gosh this is going to be bad, I’m calling 911. The two started into it, throwing punches. This is a grown man mind you and what I later learned to be a 15 year old “boy” (BIG young man). This boy had his left arm in a cast and was whaling on this guy , the older guy slumped over in his truck. I took off on a run, remembering my wrestling days, I got behind the kid and got control of him and away from the truck, the driver took off. Of course we all had to give statements, it was wild for where I’m from! My biggest fear was that one or both parties might have had a weapon, and it crossed my mind at the time, but didn’t sink in until after, what if there was a gun? What if someone else, myself, my wife got caught in crossfire? What if I had been carrying my firearm like I often do, and someone where to try and take it off of me, using it against me!? I’m glad I’m that moment I wasn’t carrying, it may have complicated things with the police. I honestly don’t know if I will continue to carry! I don’t know. 
 

Not saying you should or shouldn’t carry. But I think in a conflict like you experienced, it probably best to just walk away.

[cheezyridr]

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[Bluebasser86]

IMHO, nothing much dumber than confronting someone over a fishing spot. In my line of work, I've seen people killed over much less than what you did. It was a big lake, why not just go to a different spot? Did confronting him accomplish anything?

 

It happens, all you can do is shake your head and remember that you're fishing, it's supposed to be relaxing. 

 

[J Francho]

On 4/8/2022 at 8:05 PM, CrashVector said:

So... I guess I'm just wondering, how would you guys have handled this situation, and was I the one who was wrong or not?

I would not have reacted the way you did.  Poor behavior on both sides, since you ask.

[TOXIC]

You can always find a reason to get upset, especially if you fish pressured waters. When I was guiding, I had boats that would follow me all day when I had clients in the boat.  Kayaks have just as much right to the water as anybody else but they are limited on where they can go compared to those of us in glitter sleds.  I cut them a break and I cut bank anglers an even bigger break.  We’ve all got stories of confrontations like the vid of Ike and the guy on the potomac heck I even know of an Elite series angler who came an 1/8th mile across a bay to yell at some of my buddies fishing a bank saying he was planning on fishing there.  

[Bankc]

I never yell at strangers, never get angry, and never let the confrontation escalate.  But I don't back down and I don't show fear either.  So I will sit there and calmly explain to the guy why I'm disappointed in him.  Rather than call him names or get angry, I'll just point out that he wasn't being very considerate, and let him know that I am used to dealing with better people.  I won't expect an apology (because my opinion of this guy is already very low), and I'll graciously accept one if given.  I may even apologize in return, just to be nice.  Overall, I try to be the model for the kind of person that he should have been. 

 

Once they're ruined your spot, it's ruined.  Getting angry and yelling won't fix it.  And it will give them power over you.  It shows them that they can control you through their actions and words.  It proves that they matter to you.  Don't allow them a foothold on your mood.  Show them how little they mean to you by showing them how they cannot affect you no matter how agitated they become.  Treat them like an animal at the zoo.  It doesn't matter how ferocious they think they are, they couldn't pose a threat to you if they tried.  Because at the end of the day, you win if you forget all about the confrontation and go back to having a good day.  And you lose if you get put into a place that you can't move past.  

[fishhugger]

i've never carried. how in the world do you get in a fight --- while you're carrying? getting in a physical fight with someone, when one of you is definitely carrying, the other --- unknown.... is that how shootings happen? just asking.

[RDB]

Amazing how ZEN the posters on this site are.  Nobody gets angry…yet all hell breaks loose if someone likes fluoro over mono.  Crash shares a story where he was confronted, yet somehow it turned into he accosted some guy…read both posts.  I wish I could share a thread from one of the posters judging his behavior who inappropriately and unjustifiably blasted me with some pretty unseemly words.  Unfortunately that poster removed it, despite my request to leave it so others could see his response to me.  I’ve said my piece and Crash doesn’t need me to defend him…he’s a big boy.  I just have a hard time sitting idle when I think someone is being treated unfairly, especially when it involves what I feel is a sense of moral superiority.

[Derek1]

I can agree with allot of the different points of view here. Here’s another one. At what point does all of us always being the better man and not saying anything and walking away, just  enabling rude and ignorant people to continue being rude and ignorant. I believe that itself is a small piece of the problem these days. There’s just no accountability for anyone’s actions anymore. 
 

Not sure if I worded this properly, but I think get what I’m saying here. 

[CrashVector]

6 hours ago, fishhugger said:

i've never carried. how in the world do you get in a fight --- while you're carrying? getting in a physical fight with someone, when one of you is definitely carrying, the other --- unknown.... is that how shootings happen? just asking.

 

Um...you just don't pull your gun.

6 hours ago, RDB said:

Amazing how ZEN the posters on this site are.  Nobody gets angry…yet all hell breaks loose if someone likes fluoro over mono.  Crash shares a story where he was confronted, yet somehow it turned into he accosted some guy…read both posts.  I wish I could share a thread from one of the posters judging his behavior who inappropriately and unjustifiably blasted me with some pretty unseemly words.  Unfortunately that poster removed it, despite my request to leave it so others could see his response to me.  I’ve said my piece and Crash doesn’t need me to defend him…he’s a big boy.  I just have a hard time sitting idle when I think someone is being treated unfairly, especially when it involves what I feel is a sense of moral superiority.

 

Well it's true though.

 

I was putting my rod in the car...he walked up to ME.

 

My attitude in general is one of...I'll give you a few chances.  I'm nice at first...then I'll try and de-escalate...then I'll warn you (usually a few times)...then I'm down to get physical if they won't let it go.

[Glenn]

Fishing is supposed to be fun.  In the past, I've had days with confrontations, and even if I caught a bunch of toads that day, I only remember the confrontation.  I won't let that happen again. These things aren't worth spoiling good memories.

 

"Be the better man" , "Turning the other cheek", "Enabling poor behavior", whatever you want to call it.  I just won't let somebody else ruin my day on the water.

[fin]

5 hours ago, Glenn said:

In the past, I've had days with confrontations

 

Now there's a video I want to see!

 

?

[BrianMDTX]

13 hours ago, fishhugger said:

i've never carried. how in the world do you get in a fight --- while you're carrying? getting in a physical fight with someone, when one of you is definitely carrying, the other --- unknown.... is that how shootings happen? just asking.

If anything, it makes me double down on ending confrontations politely or simply walking away. 

[Diggy]

Fishing never ceases to surprise me. Something deemed "tranquil" can end up in a shambles.

 

 

I remember this guy was always nice to me, until I had to walk behind his house to try to retrieve a lure that I got snagged. I must have walked at the edge of the lake and attempted to retrieve my lure for less than 20 seconds. Technically it was not his property, but I am always respectful and thought because I talked to him many times he would understand.

He calls the police and says there is a "suspicious fisherman" in my backyard. I was walking around with a yellow and black Skeet Reese bag and an orange Carrot Stix rod at that time. It doesn't get more incognito than that. 

It was always war after that incident unfortunately, we ended up like Seindfeld and Newman.

[Bankc]

15 hours ago, RDB said:

Amazing how ZEN the posters on this site are.  Nobody gets angry…yet all hell breaks loose if someone likes fluoro over mono.  Crash shares a story where he was confronted, yet somehow it turned into he accosted some guy…read both posts.  I wish I could share a thread from one of the posters judging his behavior who inappropriately and unjustifiably blasted me with some pretty unseemly words.  Unfortunately that poster removed it, despite my request to leave it so others could see his response to me.  I’ve said my piece and Crash doesn’t need me to defend him…he’s a big boy.  I just have a hard time sitting idle when I think someone is being treated unfairly, especially when it involves what I feel is a sense of moral superiority.

I've got a theory that keyboards bring out the worst in people.  There's something about not being able to see or hear the person you're talking to that causes you to neglect their emotions and instead dwell on your own.  Thus it's much easier to internalize anger and harder to repress negativity.  Or so I believe.

 

I know I am much more confrontational and aggressive online that I am in real life.  And I'm not proud of that.  And I'm working on bridging that gap to make my avatar more reflective of the person behind it.  And in my experience, I'm not alone in this struggle.  I think most people are better people in real life than their online presence suggests.  

 

[BassNJake]

I'm a recovering hothead.

After an on the water confrontation "where I was sticking up for myself" my POV

"Those a-holes needed a butt whipping" my partners POV

"Why are you always this stupid" my wallets POV

 

I learned an expensive lesson, one I was taught many times before too

 

Tldr version: 2 guys began by being A-holes,

I overreacted, flipped out and threatened them

I got back to the empty boat ramp and they slashed all my tires.

4 on the truck and 5 on the boat, yep they slashed the boats spare too

 

[RDB]

2 hours ago, Bankc said:

I've got a theory that keyboards bring out the worst in people. 

I agree…and not just worst but also a false impression of the best.  The anonymity allows many to project whatever they want to be.  Just to be clear, I’m in no way suggesting going out and getting in fights.  I’m much less of a hot head today.  At 58, there is probably a biological reason for that.  However, I’m still going to point out when I believe someone is wrong and I pray that never changes.  
 

As far as telling someone they are about to run over your spot, I have done that hundreds of times, including the game warden last summer.  I’ve had a few people get mouthy but the overwhelming majority show respect and avoid the spot.  Follow any pro on the water and I bet at least once during the day they will yell at someone to back off or move away from a spot.  If it’s not happening to others, they are either fishing low pressured lakes or have chosen spots on one else wants to fish.