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  • Super User
Posted

Years ago when I was much younger, I started helping my wife with chores around the house. I still do this now. I realized that between the kids, laundry, dishes, and general housework, she was wearing herself out. She never complained, but she was always grateful for the help.                                The old saying" a women's work is never done" is 100 percent true.                                           And, here's a tip for you young newlywed guys: If you want your wife to be happy, help her out with these chores. After all, you live there too. You create your share of laundry, dirty dishes, etc. This is especially true if your wife works outside the home, and, you have young children. Trust me on this. Your wife will appreciate this help.                Do you agree? Do you help your wife with household chores?    

  • Like 12
  • Super User
Posted
Just now, Mobasser said:

Do you help your wife with household chores?    

With the wife being mostly disabled - I do it all. Clean, cook, laundry, shopping...

 

Course even when she was healthy and mobile, I still did about 50%...we both had full-time jobs so it was only fair. And that started before we were even married...we co-habitated for a year before our wedding.

  • Like 7
  • Super User
Posted

My wife: You need to do more chores around the house.

Me: Can we change the subject?

My wife: Ok. More chores around the house need to be done by you.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 11
  • Super User
Posted

  One's reproductive parts don't generally dictate where effort can, should and needs be applied.

Unless one prefers living in squaller. 

Like  @MN Fisher, My wife has been dealing with serious health concerns for a long time.

Classified as 100% disabled (although she may not 'look it'), so she does what she can.

I do the rest.

If the roles were reversed, she'd do it for me.

#marriagevowsrule

:smiley:

A-Jay

 

 

 

  • Like 15
  • Super User
Posted
5 minutes ago, Choporoz said:

My wife: You need to do more chores around the house.

Me: Can we change the subject?

My wife: Ok. More chores around the house need to be done by you.

You'll need to pick up an apron, toilet brush, scrub pads, and some cleaning spray. The local dollar store will have everything you need. Cheap too...

  • Super User
Posted

The entire premise of this post is making it seem like you are doing your wife a favor by doing these chores.  That entire mindset is part of the issue.  We all live in the same house and we all chip in as we see fit.  There is no such thing as women's work or man's work unless you want it to be that way and doing what is needed around a house you live in isn't a favor to your wife it is more disrespectful and ignorant to think you don't have to in the first place.

  • Like 7
  • Super User
Posted
1 minute ago, A-Jay said:

  One's reproductive parts don't generally dictate where effort can, should and needs be applied.

Unless one prefers living in squaller. 

Like  @MN Fisher, My wife has been dealing with serious health concerns for a long time.

Classified as 100% disabled (although she may not 'look it'), so she does what she can.

I do the rest.

If the roles were reverse, she'd do it for me.

#marriagevowsrule

:smiley:

A-Jay

 

 

 

Agree A-Jay. It works both ways.

2 minutes ago, flyfisher said:

The entire premise of this post is making it seem like you are doing your wife a favor by doing these chores.  That entire mindset is part of the issue.  We all live in the same house and we all chip in as we see fit.  There is no such thing as women's work or man's work unless you want it to be that way and doing what is needed around a house you live in isn't a favor to your wife it is more disrespectful and ignorant to think you don't have to in the first place.

I've known many guys over the years who don't see it this way.

  • Like 1
  • Super User
Posted
4 minutes ago, Mobasser said:

Agree A-Jay. It works both ways.

I've known many guys over the years who don't see it this way.

And that is part of the issue but maybe your post and the responses will open a few eyes

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
  • Super User
Posted
3 minutes ago, Mobasser said:

I've known many guys over the years who don't see it this way.

My next-door neighbor comes to mind.

Posted

Yep I help the wife out around the house and it just makes things easier for everyone.  But I do tell her once in a while that, that is a woman's job, just to see her response.  haha  Once in a while also tell her to get in the kitchen and make me a sammich.

  • Haha 4
  • Super User
Posted

Meh, we don't have any preconceived gender roles in our house.  She's just as capable at mudding drywall as I am folding laundry.  It's all got to get done, so we all pitch in.

  • Like 10
  • Super User
Posted

I worked around carpenters all my adult life. Some were a bunch of roughneck guys. They expected dinner on the table when they walked in, and never helped out around the house. I always kind of felt bad for they're wives. But, if they were happy I guess it worked for them.

  • Like 2
  • Super User
Posted

Well, there are ways to compromise...

 

At my house I do the cooking, "lift & tote" and most of the outdoor work. My wife still

works full time and I don't expect her to wait on me, but I don't like house work. I will

tiddy-up, but every other week we have a housekeeper to do a deeper clean.

  • Like 2
Posted

I dont let my wife go to the dump, empty the litter boxes or scoop up after the dogs.

Not that she cant do it, somethings are a little nastier and she doesn't have to because I can

 

When I poured concrete the guys seemed to have a more "old school" view of things.

They usually demanded a lot from their wives while they worked, cussed and drank a lot of beer.

The same guys wondered why their wife was sneaking over to the neighbors during the day

and end up divorcing them and taking half

 

  • Like 4
  • Super User
Posted
5 minutes ago, J Francho said:

Meh, we don't have any preconceived gender roles in our house.  She's just as capable at mudding drywall as I am folding laundry.  It's all got to get done, so we all pitch in.

Yea, I worked with a Hispanic guy who's wife could cut accurate all day with a heavy skilsaw. I dont know about they're housework. I'm thinking she made him do it all.

  • Confused 1
Posted

My wife and I will be married 57 years this November.  A good marriage is based on love, friendship and respect.   Marriage is a 50/50 partnership.  If you want to stay married, treat her that way.  

  • Like 12
  • Super User
Posted
11 minutes ago, J Francho said:

Meh, we don't have any preconceived gender roles in our house.  She's just as capable at mudding drywall as I am folding laundry.  It's all got to get done, so we all pitch in.

Same here, except I don't like textured walls and she won't sand. ?

  • Haha 4
  • Super User
Posted

Although we have a generally equitable chore system in place the one amazing exception is yardwork.  My wife grew up in the middle of a city and lived in urban areas her entire life until we move to a semi-rural spot maybe a decade ago. She, for some reason, was tremendously excited to do yardwork and somehow has maintain that excitement for this long. 

 

I don’t ask too many questions as obviously this does amazing things for my fishing time so this is a particular boat that I do not care to rock.  I do sort of miss being allowed to use the riding lawnmower sometimes though. 

  • Like 4
  • Haha 2
  • Super User
Posted

I have some relatives that grew up like this.  The guys did the outdoor work and the girls did the inside work.

 

I will admit that even in my own house growing up, my Mother did the bulk of the indoor work and my Father did most of the outdoor work.  I can't think of a single time when my Mother went outside to shovel snow or mow the lawn.  My Father rarely cooks or does laundry and I've never seen him use the vacuum.  I've long since moved out but I'm quite sure its still like this at their house.

 

In my own house now, I feel like I do most of the work, inside and out.  I do the laundry, cook, maintain the yard, shovel/blow snow, let the dog out, etc.  When the house needs cleaning, we both do it together.  I have a 3 year old son that requires a lot of time and patience, something I have very little of.  Quite honestly I'd rather shovel dog sh** than deal with my whiny kid most days lol.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2
  • Super User
Posted
3 minutes ago, fishwizzard said:

Although we have a generally equitable chore system in place the one amazing exception is yardwork.  My wife grew up in the middle of a city and lived in urban areas her entire life until we move to a semi-rural spot maybe a decade ago. She, for some reason, was tremendously excited to do yardwork and somehow has maintain that excitement for this long. 

 

I don’t ask too many questions as obviously this does amazing things for my fishing time so this is a particular boat that I do not care to rock.  I do sort of miss being allowed to use the riding lawnmower sometimes though. 

My wife loves the riding mower. I handle the weedeater

Posted
45 minutes ago, Mobasser said:

Years ago when I was much younger, I started helping my wife with chores around the house. I still do this now. I realized that between the kids, laundry, dishes, and general housework, she was wearing herself out. She never complained, but she was always grateful for the help.                                The old saying" a women's work is never done" is 100 percent true.                                           And, here's a tip for you young newlywed guys: If you want your wife to be happy, help her out with these chores. After all, you live there too. You create your share of laundry, dirty dishes, etc. This is especially true if your wife works outside the home, and, you have young children. Trust me on this. Your wife will appreciate this help.                Do you agree? Do you help your wife with household chores?    

 

My wife is currently staying home with our daughter and working a sales gig from there, she's doing pretty well too.  Myself?  I'm working two full time jobs and do the majority of the cooking, dishes, laundry, etc.  She deserves any down time she can get.  We have two boys as well.  Do you guys have any idea how much laundry a family of 5 with three kids goes through?  Unbelievable...

  • Like 2
Posted

Not surprised to see some good dudes are on this site based on the replies above.  My wife is a teacher.  Up until 2 years ago we both worked full time jobs and sent my boy to daycare.  Then we had my daughter.  Sending them both to daycare would cost more than what my wife made sadly so my wife decided to stop teaching and stay home with the kids even though teaching was her life long dream (on top of being a mother).  None of what we do at home is decided by who's male/female.  We do what we can when we can to help each other and keep the family running throughout the week.  Those things have changed as she's home more now just as it would have if I was the one that's home more often.  Just help each other out and learn what each other does best.  If you have kids, show them that you both can cook, clean, cut the lawn, fold laundry, and filet the fish.

  • Like 1
Posted

Tough subject. When my fiance and I marry, I will help with some wifely duties but not because I have to, but out of love and respect for her. We're Trad Cats so in our world a wife is an obedient and submissive helper to the working husband.

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