Can't believe I'm asking this but how do I fool my wife? LOL

[MickD]

It goes like this around here:  "How many rods do you need?  Don't you have enough fishing tackle?"

 

Response:  "How many purses do you need?  Don't you have enough pairs of shoes?"

 

I bought an inexpensive boat one time without first consulting her, and she's never forgotten.  Nor have I.  I don't try to trick her; I just do it and take my lumps.  Trickery in any form isn't the right solution here.  I simply explain that rod-building is my hobby and I'll probably never have enough rods, and that tackle purchases are based on replenishing and buying newly introduced stuff.  I also explain that different techniques require different equipment, a lot like different occasions require different shoes.  I don't think she understands or totally agrees, but she's not going to divorce me over it.  She is in fact more frugal than I, and i appreciate that.  But we are two different people who need to be ourselves.  As you do.

 

Works for us.  I don't think tricking is the right thing to do.  I think A-Jay has a good ideal about the wedding vows.

 

You two should be able to have an honest and rational discussion over this.  If you are taking food off the table or clothes off her back to finance your fishing, which is unlikely, then you need to reconsider your purchasing behavior.

[MN Fisher]

1 hour ago, Mobasser said:

I've been married to the same woman for 36 yrs. I've never hidden anything from her. That's why I'm still married to her.

Next year will be 30 for me and my wife - I've never hidden anything from her. Even with the annual Yule Gift from the parents, which is all my money to do what I please with, I still tell her what I'm buying and why.

 

40 minutes ago, fishballer06 said:

It's easier to ask forgiveness than to ask permission. 

Dunno if you're married or how long...but no - no it isn't. It always comes back to bite you on the rear end, eventually.

[WRB]

12 hours ago, jbsoonerfan said:

Well, I have a lot to say about this.....but for fear of no longer being a member of the forum, I will keep it simple.

 

Don't try to hide anything from your wife, be a man.

^^^^this^^^^

You learn your wife knows how to keep spending away from you, it never works out well the other way around.

Tom

[Shimano_1]

As some have already stated,  the day I need permission from my wife to spend money I've earned is the day she probably wont be my wife any longer.  I tell her if I'm going to spend a chunk just to be polite. I understand some people operate a little differently but this seems absurd to me. Maybe if she made all the money and you stayed home I could see her having more "control". My advice would be to tell her you're buying fishing gear that you've been saving for and refuse to argue about it. Good luck 

[JustJames]

2 hours ago, CrankFate said:

 

She’ll probably never see the rods, and reels are so little she’ll never see them. Forget about bank account numbers. Because, at some point, you’re going to buy things that she’s going to have to see every single day..

Last time my niece count all my rods in front of my wife, scare the hell out of me lol. But actually she knows since she can count all the rod tube from shipping that I safe in the garage.

[Koz]

[Swamp Yankee]

I never buy anything over $10 besides gasoline for my truck and groceries for the camper without talking with my wife first... boat gas I tell her about, too. 

 

I would suggest to anyone in your position to talk to their wife about having a dedicated amount of money set aside to fund their hobbies. Explain that the best time to buy is off season during sales. Then keep your purchases within that budget.

 

I try my best to pay for new gear with money raised by selling off old gear. But since I sometimes give my wife all the proceeds from the sale of something, (guitar, ukulele, banjo, boat, gun) she gives me some leeway for the most part.... when we can afford it.

 

I feel for anybody whose spouse denies them a reasonable amount of money for the things they love to do when they’re bringing enough money in so that the expense does not cause hardship in the family. And if it does cause hardship, you ought not buy the stuff in the first place.

[NYWayfarer]

15 hours ago, pauldconyers said:

I don't want to do something shady 

Then don’t. If you get caught it’s a worse “butt-chewing” then buying the items and reimbursing the account.

 

Do the right thing, even when it’s hard.

[Joe_w1234]

Don’t go behind her back. Just tell her how it means a lot to you, and these will be the best deals of the year. Show her how you can afford it, but don’t sneak around. Telling her and coming to an agreement will build a whole new level of trust to your relationship. 
Make the smart choice

Joe

[Derek1]

Save up $200 more. Then send her to get hair and nails done for the holidays.  On her way out the door let her know your ordering stuff. 

[DanielG]

20 hours ago, pauldconyers said:

Is there a better option here? 

10 hours ago, pauldconyers said:

I can certainly do without anyone making personal comments on this situation, my marriage or how they'd deal with this situation. 

 

From your first post then later on.  I assumed a conversation of the method of doing this was implied from your question.

[813basstard]

Leave her. 
Meet strange women.

Have them sponsor your fishing.

Pound beers during the process.

Go back to wife when you both realize your to old to start over.

 

Buy more tackle.

[NorcalBassin]

Since you've already set some cash aside for these purchases and want to keep the amount on the down low, your best bet to make that work is to just use a visa gift card. I have to admit, I was entertained when I read your post and saw that it was #666. Thought I was maybe being tested and my wife hacked your account or something.

 

[Hammer 4]

After 50 years of marriage, we both learned to Share..

[GreenPig]

My wife can smell new rods,reels, and swimbaits.? This at my wife's back while she's on the home computer and she can count.

[fishballer06]

On 11/16/2019 at 11:21 AM, MN Fisher said:

Dunno if you're married or how long...but no - no it isn't. It always comes back to bite you on the rear end, eventually.

It's worked just fine for me the last 3.5 years. My wife and I are fortunate enough to have enough money to buy the things that we want (within means) without having to worry about. She knows that if I buy a new reel/rod/gun/whatever, then it means that I have funds to make that purchase and still pay the bills. Same goes for her whenever she buys whatever it is that pleases her. 

[MN Fisher]

9 minutes ago, fishballer06 said:

She knows that if I buy a new reel/rod/gun/whatever, then it means that I have funds to make that purchase and still pay the bills.

So she knows and doesn't care. The OP is trying to hide his fishing purchases from his wife - big difference.

[J.Dave]

As evidenced by my presence on this site, I LOVE to fish and I'm a lady. A very close second to my love of fishing is catching a fab deal. That being said, maybe involve your lady in your black friday deal hunting. It would be couple's time. You'd both win using one of her strongest skill sets. Not to generalize but most girls like that kind of thing. Then, she will know exactly what you want and BONUS you won't have as many "Dad" gifts (although I'm sure their always quite useful, side eye) under the tree. 

[Etxwormwiggler]

On 11/16/2019 at 9:15 AM, dodgeguy said:

I hid things from my wife. They find out. Results are not good. You're better off fighting over it now.

I won’t hide them from my wife, but I won’t fight over it either. I make the money, so I also have to be considerate that she doesn’t have money to play with. When I buy myself something, I typically buy her something equal value. 

[Delaware Valley Tackle]

I guess I’m spoiled. My wife is more apt to push me to buy something nice for myself once in a while. I stopped and looked at a Tracker Heritage on display without saying much. She ordered one that night and told me the next day! It’s a two way street though. I see to that. 

[mrpao]

48 minutes ago, Delaware Valley Tackle said:

I guess I’m spoiled. My wife is more apt to push me to buy something nice for myself once in a while. I stopped and looked at a Tracker Heritage on display without saying much. She ordered one that night and told me the next day! It’s a two way street though. I see to that. 

Maybe you should've been looking at a 21' nitro.

[schplurg]

The guy says twice that he does not want marital advice and that's virtually all he gets because he "asked for it". Oh well outrage and virtue signaling is all the rage these days. 

 

Gift card.

Have a friend buy it.

PayPal.

 

[Randy Price]

On 11/16/2019 at 9:15 AM, dodgeguy said:

I hid things from my wife. They find out. Results are not good. You're better off fighting over it now.

@dodgeguy is right on the money.  I had a firearms obsession for years.  Would buy/sell/trade all the time loosing money often.  I didn't tell my wife I had been dipping into our savings.  When she found out (which eventually they always do) it almost cost me a divorce.  That happened 15 years ago and she still doesn't trust me 100% when it comes to money.  We now have separate checking accounts which on one hand I like but feel it has affected the intimacy of our marriage.  In retrospect I would not recommend it.

[NYWayfarer]

Guys the OP is past this, crisis averted. He is active on these forums since then looking to purchase deep cranking reels and Strike King line.

[pauldconyers]

1 hour ago, NYWayfarer said:

Guys the OP is past this, crisis averted. He is active on these forums since then looking to purchase deep cranking reels and Strike King line.

Correct. We talked and are good so move on.