Would you be annoyed or am I a jerk?

[Ksam1234]

25 minutes ago, Catt said:

 

Which is more important

Fishing or friendships?

 

 Not everyone shares the same enthusiasm ?

Ohhh that’s a tough one... haha jk 

[Graham]

I have friends like this, we are just cut from a different cloth. He obviously doesn’t share the same passion that you and I do. Sounds like you know what to expect when you bring him fishing so I wouldn’t expect much from him when he joins and you won’t get as upset. I wouldn’t call you an A-hole for feeling that way, but if it bugs you to the point where you are venting on a forum about it, I’d suggest fishing with someone different haha.

[islandbass]

Just be gracious. And smile. You showed him the ropes. You’ve led by example. That’s all you can do. The rest is up to him. 

 

I dont care how good any of us are, we cannot make the fish bite their hook, lol. 

 

If you friend does get into those, “why am I not catching anything “ scenarios,” let it go in one ear and out the other. Don’t let his frustrations get to you. That creates negative vibes, energy and attitude and none of these things is conducive to productive fishing or mental clarity. 

 

You can even use a coaching t chinois when you see an example as you have described about how he hooked his worm. “You know, that’s an interesting way to hook that worm...it might work but if it doesn’t, you might want to try rigging it this.”

 

Like I said earlier, if he isn’t willing and too stubborn to listen, be gracious and smile and say nothing more. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t force it to drink.  

[NittyGrittyBoy]

I agree with the others, if he's your friend just stick with it. 

 

It will be frustrating but I think catt nailed it, friends or fishing? Ultimately it's your choice

[soflabasser]

I rather take a humble newbie bass fishing with me (that's willing to listen,learn, and offer help) than a arrogant fisherman who thinks he's a great fisherman yet catches fish that are nothing out of the ordinary.

[TOXIC]

I used to love it when I was guiding to get a husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend as clients.  The men were always trying to be all macho and know-it-all about fishing to impress their females.  The differences was that the women would actually listen to what I had to say and would do what I told them.  They normally outfished their boyfriend/husband and it was a hoot.  When I would get a couple of tournament anglers in the boat as clients, I would take them to the fish and let them have at it but if they were not catching, I would give some pointers.  Usually they just brushed me off and claimed the spot was no good and wanting to move.  So, I would grab my rod and proceed to catch a few fish off the spot and tell them if they would listen to me they could do the same.  My standard saying was "I can explain it to you but I can't understand it for you".  ?

[Pro Logcatcher]

I have the exact same problem. This guy uses like 800 pound flouro and hooks into every single dock we visit. Luckily, he has gotten better and now it is just one in three docks ?

[scaleface]

Thats like fishing with my uncle . i just let him do his thing and hes happy , even though he doesnt have much success .

[NYWayfarer]

You said he gets mad when he is not catching. Hopefully he is not getting mad at you. If he is then you are not being a jerk and he needs to get the boot.

 

If he is getting mad in general then be patient. A nice solution is to have a couple of loaner rods all set up with the same rigs you are throwing on the boat. Whenever he is getting frustrated, hand him one and say, "Try this, it's what I am using" Hopefully his luck will pick up then and it saves time rigging him up.

[A-Jay]

If you enjoy your 'friend's' company, you can continue to fish with him.

If you do not enjoy his company, then I guess you don't.

If there are fish caught, and by who, all seems to sort it self out.

A-Jay

[senile1]

11 hours ago, Catt said:

 

Which is more important

Fishing or friendships?

 

 Not everyone shares the same enthusiasm ?

 

This is pretty much it.  If the person is a family member or a good friend, you deal with it in the nicest way you can.  If it gets to be too much, just limit the fishing trips to how much you can stand it.  

[Ksam1234]

2 hours ago, senile1 said:

 

This is pretty much it.  If the person is a family member or a good friend, you deal with it in the nicest way you can.  If it gets to be too much, just limit the fishing trips to how much you can stand it.  

Yeah I’m still going to go with him just wonder if I should keep showing him everything or kind of let him figure it out on his own that way maybe he feels more accomplished at the end of the day 

[blckshirt98]

The fact that he's done very little to learn, but complains at the lack of results, shows a lot about his (lack of) character.  He's the guy that will show up to the gym once every two weeks and say everyone else is on steroids.  You're not being a jerk at all, your friend is just a free-loader that wants success handed to him without doing any of the required work.

[Choporoz]

I suppose that it depends....Whose boat?  How often do you fish?  How often with him? 

I guess I'm imagining a good friend who only goes out with me every few trips....I fish for bass, almost exclusively -- but, I recognize that bass fishing is sort of a different kind of commitment than lots of other fishing....If I still wanted to fish with this friend, but I was getting my bass fix on five out of six trips, I'd maybe focus on crappie or walleye or bluegills or something when with my friend.  It might be less aggravation for you both, but still fun

[lo n slo]

18 hours ago, MassYak85 said:

There are two types of fisherman...those that enjoy fishing, and those that enjoy catching. 

?

[FishDewd]

16 hours ago, Catt said:

 

Which is more important

Fishing or friendships?

 

 Not everyone shares the same enthusiasm ?

Fishing obviously! Actually this depends upon which friend it is haha.

 

To the OP: does sound annoying. Getting a little help now and then is fine, like if you're using a new technique and know your bud is more versed than you are. That makes perfect sense. But after two years he should have the feel for techniques he uses a lot by then. No replacement for practice. What I would do is what you're doing: tell him he's gotta try it himself. If it doesn't work, before switching baits, try it a different way. Then once again. Give each one some time and effort before you give up on up and switch baits. Could be the fish want it faster, slower, more erratic, less erratic. Maybe they want a zig or a zag or a brief pause. Maybe a long pause. Too many variables and reasons for why they aren't biting a bait. So I'd basically tell him to figure it out cause you won't always be around to help him lol. He should have the confidence to do his own thing and trust his instincts.

 

[the reel ess]

Do you ever notice that when people ask you a fishing question, you answer with so much detail and qualifying information that their eyes glass over and they change the subject to sports? You're that guy and he's a casual angler. I'm that guy too. Toss him a T rigged Trick Worm and tell him to throw at every piece of cover. Color doesn't matter usually. Sometimes he'll outfish you. 

 

My buddy has 1 rod that I rig for him when we go. That's the only bait he uses and he usually catches enough to stay interested. If you want to still hang out with him just tell him what you think will work. If not, push him out of the boat. LOL

1 hour ago, blckshirt98 said:

The fact that he's done very little to learn, but complains at the lack of results, shows a lot about his (lack of) character.  He's the guy that will show up to the gym once every two weeks and say everyone else is on steroids.  You're not being a jerk at all, your friend is just a free-loader that wants success handed to him without doing any of the required work.

Skips every other leg day. But to give you an idea of how dedicated I am, I quit the gym because it was taking up too much fishing time.

[LionHeart]

2 hours ago, Ksam1234 said:

Yeah I’m still going to go with him just wonder if I should keep showing him everything or kind of let him figure it out on his own that way maybe he feels more accomplished at the end of the day 

Willing to wager, like myself, most of the info you've gathered about fishing came from another fisherman.  Yes? Pass it on to ole' buddy.  The info you now have certainly doesn't have a patent.  

 

You got it from YouTube, etc., be his YouTube, etc.

[Catt]

@FishDewd I have a close friend that goes out with me 4-5 times a year & has for the last 30 years. After he parks his boat he seldom if ever thinks about fishing. Every trip out it's the same routine with a few advancements in technology. He loves perch jerking, I love bass fishing, so we combine the two.

 

It aint about the number of fish we catch, it's about the fellowship shared!

[WRB]

I have or had a few friends that loved to fish and they were good at the mechanics of casting and knot tieing and fun to fish, good freinds. Good fishermen but no interest regarding being aware of what is going on, where the bass are and what lure to use was a total mystery to them. They ask what do you want me to use today, I tell them what may work, what rigs and lures I going to use and they are happy to go along with whatever we do. I would point out where to cast, how fast or slow and what depth and try hard to put them on fish. 

Some days we did good, sometimes we don't but we always had fun enjoying sharing each other's company and catching up on life. Enjoy it while you can before your freinds are just a memory.

Tom

[Columbia Craw]

You are not a jerk, period.  He is not stupid.  You are motivated to learn and committed to put in the time, effort and expense, he is not or at least not yet. There is a big difference in fishing buddies going out together and a fisherman who goes out with a friend.  With bass fishing the disparity is even greater because the skill levels required to cast and feel a strike are not like cat fishing or perch fishing.  If he has any interest at all, you can choose to be a mentor and help him get up to speed so he's at least proficient. End your outing with a question for your friend.  " What could we have done different today to catch em" ?  If he doesn't have a response, redefine what activities you choose to share with him.  Finally, you're not a jerk.

[FishDewd]

1 hour ago, Catt said:

@FishDewd I have a close friend that goes out with me 4-5 times a year & has for the last 30 years. After he parks his boat he seldom if ever thinks about fishing. Every trip out it's the same routine with a few advancements in technology. He loves perch jerking, I love bass fishing, so we combine the two.

 

It aint about the number of fish we catch, it's about the fellowship shared!

That's great! Always good to have that sort of friendship where you can combine both.

[Bankbeater]

IMO you have two choices, start fishing alone, or you can do what I did with my daughters. When I took them fishing I didn't expect to do a lot of fishing myself.  I just kind of sat back and ran the boat and helped them.

[JustJames]

Next time he asks you just toss him a can of earthworm and tell him guaranteed to catch fish.

[soflabasser]

2 hours ago, the reel ess said:

Skips every other leg day. But to give you an idea of how dedicated I am, I quit the gym because it was taking up too much fishing time.

Fishing can be a decent form of cardiovascular exercise if you are walking a lot during the day or kayaking for several hours. For some reason plenty of guys train upper body 5 days a week and don't train lower body, which explains why many guys have a big upper body and no legs. Plenty of guys in my gym are on steroids ( they openly discuss cycles) and think they are in great shape but can't even run a simple 10K run, or swim for 2 hours in the open sea. In fact many of them are quite weak for their size and get outlifted by natural athletes that weigh 30-60 pounds less than they do. You will be better off going to a park 3-5 times a week and focus on calisthenics/cardiovascular fitness than lifting weights like a bodybuilder who neglects his cardiovascular health and is in terrible cardiovascular health.

7 hours ago, senile1 said:

 

This is pretty much it.  If the person is a family member or a good friend, you deal with it in the nicest way you can. 

Well said. I don't expect my all my friends and family to be good fishermen and honestly don't care. I just want to spend a good time with them and they catch fish it will be a plus. Life is too short to fish alone and not enjoy time with those that you care for you.