Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted October 23, 2015 Super User Posted October 23, 2015 Do you want the short list or the long list? I have said more stuff I shouldn't have, and gotten in more trouble over it. Some examples. Yes that makes you look fat. You are very smooth and soft. Soft like a pig. Biggest mistake I made was keeping you instead of my dog. You dance as well as an epileptic at a rave. Those are the first four that come to mind... Quote
shootermcbob Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Do you want the short list or the long list? I have said more stuff I shouldn't have, and gotten in more trouble over it. Some examples. Yes that makes you look fat. You are very smooth and soft. Soft like a pig. Biggest mistake I made was keeping you instead of my dog. You dance as well as an epileptic at a rave. Those are the first four that come to mind... Raider...you sir are one smooth talker...bet you have ALOT of ...ahem...alone time Quote
Super User Bankbeater Posted October 23, 2015 Super User Posted October 23, 2015 "Aren't you going to wear makeup". Sometimes my mouth misfires before my brain can catch it. 2 Quote
PourMyOwn Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 "Who would be dumb enough to throw a Halloween party when the Buckeyes play a night game this week? I'm dressing up like a ghost, as in nobody will see me." We have been over this before, there are 15 or so days in the year I will not be going to any functions, it's even written that my own funeral will not be held during an OSU game. Quote
Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted October 23, 2015 Super User Posted October 23, 2015 Raider...you sir are one smooth talker...bet you have ALOT of ...ahem...alone time I spent a lot of alone time in that relationship. All those were from a previous relatiomship. In my defense though. We had been to the petting zoo, and theh had a baby pig. It was extremely soft and smooth. I hadn't meant the pig comment as an insult. Honestly the implications of that comment never occurred to me until after I had said it. 1 Quote
Global Moderator Mike L Posted October 23, 2015 Global Moderator Posted October 23, 2015 I said..."Do these pants make me look as fat as"....... She said..."What did you say"... Mike 1 Quote
Siebert Outdoors Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 I told you that would happen. 1 Quote
lmoore Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 "Why would I do that when I could do something fun?" She had just asked me to watch Days of Our Lives with her, and apparently my comment meant I didn't have fun around her ever. Quote
Jake the Cake Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Girlfriend: I had NO butt when I was in high school Me: That makes sense Girlfriend: What's that supposed to mean? Me: You don't have much of one now I thought she was aware of this but apparently not. Or hasn't come to terms with it. Either way, it did not go over well. 3 Quote
68camaro Posted October 24, 2015 Posted October 24, 2015 "What do you do all day".......don't ask how I know, it didn't end well! Quote
Super User HoosierHawgs Posted October 24, 2015 Super User Posted October 24, 2015 I don't know what I shouldn't say... But what you don't want to hear is "I just find it funny how..." Stop right here. You do not want to know what's funny. Quote
Global Moderator Bluebasser86 Posted October 24, 2015 Global Moderator Posted October 24, 2015 I used this little gem from the man himself last time my wife was obviously in the mood to pick a fight. I figured if I was going to be getting yelled at I might as well make it good. Telling her "It's not that bad", when she's freaking out over something is always a good move too. 4 Quote
Last_Cast Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 Calm down ****, we're in the same boat with that one..wasnt the best idea.. Quote
Last_Cast Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 I used this little gem from the man himself last time my wife was obviously in the mood to pick a fight. I figured if I was going to be getting yelled at I might as well make it good. Telling her "It's not that bad", when she's freaking out over something is always a good move too. watched that episode last night actually..Red is the man Quote
Super User Catch and Grease Posted October 28, 2015 Super User Posted October 28, 2015 You probably shouldnt acidentally call her by her friends name... Quote
Super User bigbill Posted October 28, 2015 Super User Posted October 28, 2015 Our relationship flourishes when I don't talk... lolJust say nothing silence is golden.The secret to being married 41 years is,,,,, Three tv's in separate rooms. Why three in case one dies.(tv). Don't get her ginsu knives. Or learn the kungfu moves to dodge them. Or run forest, run and zig zag so you dodge them in flight. A couch pillow can be a life saver for catching them. Lol/ kidding. We don't argue. It's my way or the highway. It's noisy in this cardboard box on I70? Being married is a partnership between you, your wife and the dog. The dog gets better taken care of. I wonder if I poop on the floor if that will help.??? She walks the dog I go fishing. I love my life, my wife and the dog and six cats. Life is good. I only got married once if that ever changes at 65yo I'd adopt two thirty year olds next. Well maybe a 30yo and a 35yo?(65?) Or two 20yo and one 25yo?(=65?) Now if you really want to pizz her off ask her while she's cleaning the cats litter box, tell her we have a toilet she can use now it's ok. U thought married with children was a good show. Sorry I'm a few cents short of a happy meal today. Lmao Life should be great with your partner, humor along the way is good. 1 Quote
bassin is addicting Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Is that part of your diet? I don't have to worry about saying that because my wife has an awesome body but I'm just guessing that that's not something you should say to your wife. Quote
Super User bigbill Posted October 29, 2015 Super User Posted October 29, 2015 I don't say anything about the wife's weight. She will stop eating. She's only 125lbs now and 5'8". She looks great but she needs to gain a few pounds. I tell her she's pretty, sexy, my Angel, still looking hot etc. Never touch the weight issue, hair coloring (grey hair), getting old, wrinkles etc. If ya have nothing good to day, don't speak. Quote
Super User Ratherbfishing Posted October 29, 2015 Super User Posted October 29, 2015 When asked "Do these jeans make me look fat?", a few wrong answers are: "Said the white whale to Captain Ahab." "No, it's your butt that makes you look fat" "Not as fat as those shorts you wore yesterday." "They don't MAKE you look fat but they sure don't help" Quote
68camaro Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 You're a lot like your mother. Wow, that's a twofer', one against your wife and bonus points for bringing her family into argument, esp. her ma'. Best way to extend an argument is bring her family into it. 1 Quote
Super User Maxximus Redneckus Posted November 1, 2015 Super User Posted November 1, 2015 Been married twice all younger then me .like 10 and 15 yrs younger.i dont know it all but i have learned the silent treatment and being distant lets them realize im the perfect hubby. Quote
Catch 22 Posted November 2, 2015 Posted November 2, 2015 After 49 yrs there have been no tornados in our relationship, just a few dust devils.The one thing I learned not to do is call her by her mothers name. C22 Quote
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