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Posted

No need to worry about me. Glenn pays me big bucks to keep his mods on their toes. :wink2:

In that case, fire away. Did she say that too?

  • Super User
Posted

No need to worry about me. Glenn pays me big bucks to keep his mods on their toes. :wink2:

I recall saying something similar to that and it came back and bit me. :(

  • Super User
Posted

I recall saying something similar to that and it came back and bit me. :(

Well then I take back everything

  • Super User
Posted

The older I get....the better I was

  • Like 1
  • Global Moderator
Posted

Fishing relaxes me. It's like yoga, except I still get to kill something.

 

Ron Swanson

Posted

Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk.

Then spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and shut up.

  • Super User
Posted

Never argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level, and beat you with experience.

  • Super User
Posted

The evening news begins with "Good evening", and proceeds to detail precisely why it isn't.

  • Like 3
Posted

If your little brother drowns don't bring him home.

  • Super User
Posted

One of my favorite was Gen Stormin Norman Swartzkopff, a reporter had asked "General, how many tomahawk missiles were fired from submarines."

"What's a submarine?" Was the response.

  • Super User
Posted

FIFTY years in love with the same woman,

if my wife finds out she'll kill me!

 

 

Roger

  • Like 1
Posted

Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the live lobsters in the ship's kitchen.

  • Super User
Posted

The best one liner I've heard came from Tony Beets on the Gold Rush series.

 

Upon finally getting his gold dredge operating, and seeing gold in the pan said, "This is the most fun I've had with my clothes on."

  • Super User
Posted

"You can observe a lot just by watching." - Yogi !

Posted

When a sheriff was asked by the news media why his deputies shot a suspected cop killer 54 times the sheriff replied, "That was all the bullets we had."

  • Like 2
  • Super User
Posted

I've lost more money chasing women than I've lost women chasing money- Bass Resource thread Author Unknown

  • Super User
Posted

When I'm good, I'm very good!

But when I'm bad, I'm better!

Mae West

Posted

"Can I borrow your towel for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo."

Fletch

Posted

“I taught Sunday School for two years. And I got fired. I abused my authority. I used to teach class like this, “OK, if one more person talks, everybody is going to Hell.” – Maragaret Cho

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