I Feel Strange

[Raider Nation Fisher]

Its been one thing after another these past however many months. I don't know what I want out of life anymore. I feel as if my marriage is completely dead. I'm not sure if I even feel like trying to invest the energy into it now. Its like I'm living with a room mate that just happened to mother my children.

The happiest I have been in the past months. Aside from when my son was born. Was Thursday when my brother electrician called, and told me to pack my bags cause Omaha just busted wide open. I packed my tools from my work area and was heading to drag up the job. About 20ft from the boss' trailer my phone rings. My wife was going hysterical. She went as far as to threaten, to make it so I would never see my kids again if I left the state right now. Well I ain't losing my kids forever. That ain't gonna happen. So here I sit working 5 10s and having and feeling nothing. I am honestly emotionally numb now.

I don't want to be in this state, this city, this apartment, or currently at this power house. I feel hardly any joy or anything in my life now. The only time when I'm happy is when I'm at the gym. Its the only thing that even makes me feel somewhat alive. I don't drink or party or anything anymore. I work, I sleep, and I pump iron. That's what my life revolves around now.

I'm just posting this to let y'all know I ain't left the site. I'm just going through some things. I read yalls post everyday. A lot of them even put a smile on my face. I just don't have the energy to respond.

There's got to be more to life then this. There has to be someone or something that can make it worth living. I can't carry on like this. Ive embraced the darkness for too long. I want back into the light. This nightmare it never ends. Where is the light at the end.

[deaknh03]

Yoyr kids are the light...focus that energy on them, playing, reading..whatever, just give them that time and energy. and dude, your wife just popped a kid out, cut her some slack..she doesnt wanna be left as the sole caretaker while your away, plus shes emotionally a roller coaster now because of the childbirth. Your a good man and you will pull thru and do the right things..pm me if you wanna chat.

[Oregon Native]

Wow....sad.  Do hope things work out...sent a short one upstairs for ya.

[Sam]

Hang in there.

 

Football season is here for some diversion to life's problems.

 

As stated above, focus on your kids. They are very important and you have to be a big part of their life.

 

Seek professional counseling for yourself.  Try to understand why your wife is like she is and how you can handle the situation.

 

All the best for something good happening to you in the near future.

[clayton86]

I feel ya brother that's how the last 7 years of my life has been spent with the occasional break the wife and I took and now the final permanent one. Need anything shoot me a pm man I've been threw it all

[Catch and Grease]

*2 for professional counseling....

Hang in there man, good things happen to good people!

[slonezp]

This too shall pass

[K_Mac]

Raider, deaknh is right. It sounds like you and your wife are going through the challenges that come with a new baby, financial challenges, and the general ennui that comes from dealing with life that does not seem to meet your expectations. Life will throw you some curves. I will pray for you and yours my friend. I take great comfort in that. PM me if you want to talk.

[Lund Explorer]

Deaknh said it almost perfectly, you've got a couple of great children that should be the joy of your life.  You need to embrace all those things that are going so good in your life and not stress out about the day to day bull.  Put those priorities in order the way they are meant to be: God, family, friends, and then work.  When you concentrate on all of the really important things the rest will fall into place.  As hard as this might be to believe, there's plenty of us who look upon your life as being a whole lot better than what we're going through.

 

BTW, we've all heard about men suffering though sympathetic labor pains.  Thanks for giving me the chance to do a Google search for male pattern postpartum depression! 

[Jigfishn10]

Hang in there Bud, we've all been there...like slonezp said, this too will pass.

[Mr_Scrogg]

Simple fact you were very close to moving halfway across the country, leaving your wife and newborn, as well as your other child on a whim, without any hesitation shows you should seek some help for how things are going.

As bad as you think things are, they can be worse.

[fishinfiend]

I don't drink or party or anything anymore. I work, I sleep, and I pump iron. That's what my life revolves around now.

 

 

Don't lose that and allow it to keep you focused while you work to improve the other areas of you life. Life will unfold as it should. While it may be unpleasant at times, the best is ahead of you. Be strong, bro and keep your head up.

 

[roadwarrior]

Your kids are the light...focus that energy on them, playing, reading..whatever, just give them that time and energy. and dude, your wife just popped a kid out, cut her some slack..she doesnt wanna be left as the sole caretaker while your away, plus shes emotionally a roller coaster now because of the childbirth. Your a good man and you will pull thru and do the right things..pm me if you wanna chat.

 

Man up.  There is plenty of help available in Birmingham, privately for a fee or for free from agencies and churches.

Your wife has every right to be hysterical. Unless you are active military and called to serve, no MAN should leave

his bride with a newborn and other family obligations.

[quanjig]

EPL starts Saturday, that should give you some relief!! Seriously, I don't have any children so I can't help you there, but you obviously love your wife and children. Take a quick step back, take inventory of all the good things in your life right now and focus on how to make things better! I know you can do it, you sir are not a quitter!

[Raider Nation Fisher]

Man up. There is plenty of help available in Birmingham, privately for a fee or for free from agencies and churches.

Your wife has every right to be hysterical. Unless you are active military and called to serve, no MAN should leave

his bride with a newborn and other family obligations.

Feeding my family and providing for them is part of the obligation. 4300 a week makes it a lot easier to meet those obligations. They are allowed to travel anywhere I do. They were invited to go too. I'm not trying to be combative and hope it doesn't come across that way.

[VolFan]

Bro - you're tired, and cranky. You don't just toss a newborn into a car to go live in another city open ended with no family or friend support network for your wife as she sits in a hotel all day with two kids. Would it be easier if you were younger with no responsibilities to just pick up and go? Of course it would. But I wouldn't trade my kid for that life, and I doubt you would either. Newborns are haaaaaard.

Two healthy kids and steady employment is nothing to sneeze at. So hitch up your skirt go hug your wife and stop being a little ***** about it.

[Raider Nation Fisher]

Update.

Changed my dosage on some stuff and my mood has improved dramatically. In just that short of an amount of time. There are still problems there. However, I feel better about them somewhat and not as doom and gloom anymore. Thanks for the responses. Y'all keep thinking of me and I'll keep y'all updated.

Thanks. Jacob

[VolFan]

Glad you took my advice.

[Raider Nation Fisher]

Glad you took my advice.

You gave some very good advice. Very valid points I ain't think about.