Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted March 23, 2014 Super User Posted March 23, 2014 So a woman from Connecticut is attempting to sue the state. 4 years after having her face eaten and hands ripped off by her friends chimpanzee. First off why were you messing with a chimpanzee? Those things are down right mean. This ain't the first time a chimp has mauled someone either. I now feel my person is threatened by chimp lovers. In response I'm getting a pet gorilla. Not some puny female gorilla. I want a dang silverback gorilla. I'm gonna name him Chongo the 2nd Raider Gorilla.(We already have Gorilla Rilla the Raider Gorilla. So that name and title is taken.) Ain't a chimpanzee alive brave enough to mess with Chongo. Hell I don't think a person alive will mess with my massive monkey. That thing will rip your legs off and beat ya to death with them. Im trying to get work to let me bring him with me. He will be the best electrician gorilla EVER! A tugger can't even pull wire like this big fella. Hopefully, I will have him in time for the road trip. I really want my new buddy to learn how to fish. Is everyone okay with sharing a boat with me and my primate friend. He said he promises to be on best behavior. Unless of course your a chimp owner. Quote
gripnrip Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 I remember this story. How in the hell is it the states fault? Maybe she should sue her friend. Or "LIGHTBULB" don't sue because she is an idiot for going over there knowing that the chimp wasn't to friendly. Quote
Nice_Bass Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 out of all the dumb things I have read in my life this has to be up towards the top. Unfortunately, that is in reference to your entire post and not the tort in discussion. Lol 1 Quote
Super User Root beer Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Put the bottle of absinthe down and go to bed, Raider, you're drunk. 1 Quote
Super User Redlinerobert Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 And here I was thinking this thread was about you needing protection. Quote
Super User deaknh03 Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 exactly how high do you get before you post this stuff? 2 Quote
Super User Raul Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Random thoughts of a tortured mind ........ Quote
crankcaster100 Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 I remember laughing while listening to that 911 call. I know I shouldn't have been laughing but when the responder was asking about who was beating her friend she cried out that it was her chimpanzee. I just lost it ROFL Quote
Super User SirSnookalot Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 out of all the dumb things I have read in my life this has to be up towards the top. Unfortunately, that is in reference to your entire post and not the tort in discussion. Lol You actually read it all? Quote
Maico1 Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 I am thoroughly convinced you were the one with the wet nose and momma threw you out first...... Quote
Super User Sam Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Raider's humor is something to appreciate. Sit back; read what he posts; and look for the humor or satire. What you have to understand is that no matter what Raider pens there is a thread of truth hidden in his posts. Go get 'em, Raider! 1 Quote
Global Moderator Bluebasser86 Posted March 24, 2014 Global Moderator Posted March 24, 2014 This video instantly came to mind while reading this. Oddly enough, it has frequently been the center of discussion among myself and some of my coworkers and how we should get "trunk monkeys" installed at work. Next time someone is running their mouth or refusing to do what they're told just push the trunk monkey button, problem solved Quote
Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted March 24, 2014 Author Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Wow. I honestly don't remember posting all of that. I was a tad out of it yesterday. That doesnt change the main theme though. I DO want a gorilla though. Quote
Super User SirSnookalot Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Wow. I honestly don't remember posting all of that. I was a tad out of it yesterday. That doesnt change the main theme though. I DO want a gorilla though. Monkey see monkey do? 1 Quote
Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted March 24, 2014 Author Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Monkey see monkey do? Most definitely. LOL Quote
Super User Grizzn N Bassin Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 some silverback gorilla action Quote
Super User Root beer Posted March 24, 2014 Super User Posted March 24, 2014 What about evil gorilla? Like the ones from the movie Congo? Quote
Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted March 24, 2014 Author Super User Posted March 24, 2014 Or Magilla? That's what they call me at work. Quote
Super User Raider Nation Fisher Posted March 24, 2014 Author Super User Posted March 24, 2014 What about evil gorilla? Like the ones from the movie Congo? Bout that size. Quote
Hyrule Bass Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 just hire Redskins left tackle Trent "Silverback" Williams 1 Quote
Stlbob Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 What if the Gorilla wants to spoon..? I mean they get lonely too. 1 Quote
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