Cellphone/14Yr Old

[Daddyodo]

I have a 14 yr old who is starting High School next week and she insists that she should have a cell phone. We have had this discussion for 2 years. I have always said that a 12 -13-14 -15 year old does not need a cell phone. Now I can see where a kid with only one parent around or a kid whose parents both work alot should have one, but that is not the case with my daughter. My wife or I are always around and if we are not it is only for an hour or 2. Now I know what you are going to say"anything can happen in that time period" that may be true but there are plenty of people she hangs with who have phones. By the way, I hear that all the time " but all my friends have one" and my response is "if all your friends have a big butt would you want one too?

So, we are having this conversation again last night but this time my wife and I were ready. When she brought up the issue of a phone again we responded that :yes, we agree you should have a phone. But, here are the conditions:

She must carry a B average for the 1st quarter. Anything less, she gets nothing.

All the minutes must be paid by her and her alone.

I will shell out the initial cost of a new phone, but, it will be a PHONE NOT A MINI COMPUTER.

If she wants a Smart Phone she will have to be Smart enough how to figure out how to pay for it.

So, how have you guys handled the issue of phones for your teenagers?

[J Francho]

Tracfone for my son since he was 12. He earns minutes. Since he alternates weeks with his mother and I, it's easier for him to get in touch with either of us on the off week. It's also a great help with pickup times after sports practice.

[Bassn Blvd]

No one can sell me a story as to they MUST have a cell phone. I didn't have one until 1997 and I was 30 years old.

[nick76]

I have a 14 y.o. stepson who had to have one last year when he started high school as well. He is an extremely smart kid, but has little to no motivation. We have tried everything. So with him starting HS we decided to try some reverse psychology and get him one under two conditions. 1) He kept his grades at a "B" average and 2) he helped out around the house. He lost it by Christmas only to work a little harder and get his grades back up. As soon as he got it back, down went the grades again. So at the end of the school year when he brought home a "D" average his mother took the phone. He cried enough to his father that he went out and got him a new phone under one condition..............that he doesn't let his mother or me tell him when he can and cannot use it. So I have made it the rule that he can leave it at his father's house and don't bother to bring it here. Classic Co-parenting skills!!

Back to the question......I am ok with my kid having one if they are a good kid and willing to hold up their end of the bargain. However, you earn it, you take care of it, and don't ignore my rules. I also ask for the phone every now and again and you better hand it right over......you have no privacy if you live in my house. My buddy is a county sheriff and he says they get called the schools all the time about kids texting inappropriate pictures to one another. They give the parents two options....1) destroy the cell phone by driving the car over it in the parking lot or 2) take it back to the lab and erase it completely with a report being made and passed along to the prosecutor. He said you would be surprised at the number of parents who say destroy it and then they file an insurance claim on the phone and the kid has a new one in a day or two. No lesson learned.

[CKFishin]

Simple they want a phone give them one block all actions except to numbers you will allow... Don't give them a smart phone either. Also a lot of parents don't know this but turn the GPS tracking on in it but don't tell them... Now you know if they lie about where they go as well...

[BASSclary]

I've had one since I was in 6th grade. It helps so that I can be free and do my own thing, walk to friends houses and stuff like that, and I can keep in touch with my parents so they know i'm safe, and of course for emergencies. It also helped a TON with other school/sport related activities, so I could call my parents and tell them stuff like cancelations, longer practices, etc, that they would not know.

IMO, they should have atleast a basic phone. They want a smartphone? If they really want it, tell them to pay the bill for it. Thats what I do. I think I pay somewhere around $40 a month, my share of the family plan. That includes internet also. As far as not wanting your kids looking at the nudies on certain websites, you can easily block that by calling your service provider

[Raider Nation Fisher]

I had to share myy moms cell phone from the age of 14 until I went to college, and got my own. There were no such things as smart phones back then. Just dumb phones that you could run over with a tank and it would still work.

I can see getting them a regular cell phone. Yet I can't see why a fourteen year old would need a smart phone. Society is just down right strange these days.

If you really want to put one over on her buy her a pager.

[Bassn Blvd]

There's a program you can download that will allow you to read all incoming and outgoing texts from a particular phone. Just be dang sure you're prepared to handle some of the things that you'll be reading.

[SirSnookalot]

Am I fan, not really, but it's the way of the world these days. Kids don't have phones to just make calls, it's their social outlet. I have 5 gr children ranging in age from 5-18 years, they all have smartphones and can work them better than me..lol. For the most part they are good kids, do well in school, have other activities that help make them more well rounded, all their friends as well as their parents have them..................so I say why not !

Sitting next to each other on the couch texting each other sounds pretty stupid to me, but that's what they do, my parents thought I did some pretty stupid things when I was 14.

My wife looks at me as being some kind of idiot for spending time on forums, not only fishing, personally I think she is right, I am an idiot, so it's hard for me to be overly critical of gr children.

[Bluebasser86]

Got my first cell phone when I turned 16 and started driving in case my truck broke down or in case I had boat problems or stuck in a field while I was hunting. My first phone made it a whole month until I leaned over the hole while I was ice fishing and it fell straight down the hole I have since continued my terrible luck with phones. I've jumped in the lake with my phone in my pocket twice, waded in with one in my pocket, dropped one down a stairwell from the second story of a parking garage, and my personal favorite threw a 3 month old Iphone and otterbox that was a birthday present from my wife in the lake on a hookset while I was talking to said wife The one I have now is my longest surviving one so far, nearly 2 years old

Back to your topic though my first phone was a cheap Nokia, it made calls and that was it. If I wanted anything fancier I had to pay for it. With a record like that with phones there is no way I'd buy a fancy phone for myself but there has been more than once that having one saved my bacon.

[deaknh03]

Get one of the real old ones, with the backpack and cord, like this.

[Daddyodo]

Get one of the real old ones, with the backpack and cord, like this.

LOVE IT!

[Fishing Rhino]

No one can sell me a story as to they MUST have a cell phone. I didn't have one until 1997 and I was 30 years old.

Same here. but I was 56 years old. How did I survive?

[Bassn Blvd]

Same here. but I was 56 years old. How did I survive?

We didn't. We're the figment of someone elses imagination.

[Long Mike]

X3. 1998. I was 52. Geez Rhino! I thought I was the resident Old Fart. You've got me beat by four years. Do you want me to send you my walker?

[Fishing Rhino]

X3. 1998. I was 52. Geez Rhino! I thought I was the resident Old Fart. You've got me beat by four years. Do you want me to send you my walker?

Do I know you? Where am I? What am I doing here?

[Fishing Rhino]

We didn't. We're the figment of someone elses imagination.

Hmmmmm, that must mean you're a figment of my imangination since I know I'm here. But if you are a figment of my imagination, it means you're not all there.

[SirSnookalot]

In 1988 I was 33 and purchased my first mobile phone, one of the best things I did, for me it was a valuable business tool for communication. Even more important was the necessity to make calls for towing, mobile tire repair and related truck mishaps (pretty common in the scrap metal business), it beat walking in sub zero weather to try and find a phone, especially if out in the country someplace. Once I got off the truck, my drivers were supplied with one for the same reasons.

[J Francho]

One thing I noticed, there were payphones at school when I grew up. That, and you could ALWAYS use the office telephone if necessary. That isn't the case anymore. My son's school has a payphone....at the 7-11 about a mile away. It's just far more convenient than having him borrow someone else's cell phone to call me when he's staying after. I will say I find it annoying that the thing isn't allowed in class, but they don't provide access to a public telephone.

[moguy1973]

You can always get them one of these:

It has a mom and dad button, and a list of 20 other numbers it can call and that's it...Hey, all they said is they wanted a cell phone, they didn't say which one and what it could do...

[deaknh03]

You can always get them one of these:

It has a mom and dad button, and a list of 20 other numbers it can call and that's it...Hey, all they said is they wanted a cell phone, they didn't say which one and what it could do...

Dude, hide that thing before my wife gets me one!

[BASSclary]

You can always get them one of these:

It has a mom and dad button, and a list of 20 other numbers it can call and that's it...Hey, all they said is they wanted a cell phone, they didn't say which one and what it could do...

Unless your kid is four, he will be horribly embarrassed to the point of not even using the thing, and you'll be paying for it. Just get a basic phone, that looks like a basic phone.

[moguy1973]

Unless your kid is four, he will be horribly embarrassed to the point of not even using the thing, and you'll be paying for it. Just get a basic phone, that looks like a basic phone.

that's the thing though, you get them a basic phone and they'll be embarrassed to use that too since it's not easy to text on or it's not what their friends have, or it doesn't get the internet, or it doesn't do this or that...Then you have to hear the constant begging for a smart phone, then the latest and greatest...it just escalates from there...

[J Francho]

Embarrassment as a parenting tool.... Straight up setting boundaries, and educating your child about the PRIVILEGE it is to have the phone is an easier route. Worked for me.

[Stasher1]

that's the thing though, you get them a basic phone and they'll be embarrassed to use that too since it's not easy to text on or it's not what their friends have, or it doesn't get the internet, or it doesn't do this or that...Then you have to hear the constant begging for a smart phone, then the latest and greatest...it just escalates from there...

There are touch screen basic phones with slide-out qwerty keypads that look like smart phones. The teen years are hard enough sometimes without intentionally subjecting your kids to ridicule.

My 13 yr old carries an LG Cosmos Touch that's capable of performing many of the same functions as a smart phone, but we have them disabled.