Picking Up And Moving Whose Done It

[clayton86]

Who here has picked up everything and moved outa state?

A while ago I had posted about moving to Texas in search of a job in the oil industry. I'm still toying with the idea but I wouldn't even know where to start. I mean besides the obvious of looking for and getting a job. I don't know if i should get the job first go work for a few months well looking for a place and move the family down later or bring them down and make the jump all at once. I Just wanna get out of New York and never look back I have a year left in my National guard contract when I get back state side I figured soon as that's up jut pick up and leave. I wouldn't be leaving much behind besides my in laws most my friends have already moved out of state but they are all single and its easier without a family. So besides my wifes family we wouldent be leaving much behind iv pretty much completely dis owned my mother and my father probably wont make it another year maybe 2 at best his doctors told him yesterday. My dad is actually the only thing that would hold me back so he can see his grand kids as much as possible he knows I know the whole family knows times ticking.

So whose done it picked up there family and moved either out of state or across a state. I'v done it when i was single but it only lasted 2 years and I ended back in my home town small hick towns have a way of doing that some how they don't let you leave.

[Stasher1]

We've changed states a couple times, but it gets harder as the kids get older. When we moved NH to AL it was just the two of us, and we had a place to stay ready to go when we got there.

The move from AL to GA was completely different though, because we had two kids, three vehicles (four if you count the motorcycle), a house full of furniture, etc. The wife's employer paid for the movers, but we were on our own when it came to finding a house. We did a good bit of research on neighborhoods, schools, and average rental prices within a reasonable distance of the wife's job, and then had my in-laws watch the kids for a few days while we looked at rental houses.

We wound up renting for a year, and spent a good bit of that time learning about the area and figuring out exactly where we wanted to live so that when our lease was up, we could just buy a house and move.

It gets quite a bit harder of your employer won't pay for your moving expenses. Renting a U-Haul is cheap, but unless your friends/family are willing to make the trip to help, you're going to be on your own to unload it.

[clayton86]

see my kids are still young which is why I wanna do it sooner then later Noah just turned 3 and Jack will be 1 in a few weeks.

[rockchalk06]

Make peace with your old man now. Not tomorrow, right now no matter what your doing. Right now!

That call will come one night and you will have wished you could have said a 1000 things.

[VolFan]

I echo everything Stasher said. Moving ain't cheap. If you get there and find out you don't like it or can't find work, then you're poor, and have no family/friends to help. Depending on how much stuff you have, renting for a year can really help you figure out where you want to live. I have done that every time of the three tiems I've moved over the past 8+ years. Mkae sure you like where you're going or it can put a severe strain on your family life. Everybody needs to be happy (especially momma) not just you.

[NorcalBassin]

No one knows if it's the right time except for you and your wife. Your dad's situation and the "close" in-laws are HUGE variables and shouldn't be dismissed as the "only" things you'd be leaving behind. If your wife is close to her parents then a cross country move may put an incredible amount of stress on your marriage when she loses her network of friends and the proximity of her parents, and taking away 1-2 years of memories for your kids and their grandpa may be something you regret the rest of your life.

I'm definitely not saying don't do it... just really spend some time thinking about all the pro's and cons to help determine if it's worth it in the long run. If you're 100% miserable where you are and know that you'll be 100% happy elsewhere, then you should probably go. As the husband and father your attitude will be the biggest factor for whether or not your family is happy. We've moved a couple thousand miles away before (no kids at the time), but the distance from family pulled us back within a year. That was 15 years ago and we've never once regretted the move back (especially once we had kids and were able to see them get to know their grandparents so well). Very tough decision and I wish you the best of luck.

[Long Mike]

Clayton, by all means. get the job first, and make sure it's one that you like. There's no use in dragging your family around the country while you look for work. If I were you I would start looking for work now, via the internet, Put together a resume' and start sending it to those oil field companies we talked about earlier Go to their websites and search for their job openings. Before I went into business for myself I was a "corporate guy." Yes, I wore a suit and tie. I have had a lot of experience in reviewing resume's, so if you want to PM me with your proposed resume' I will be more than happy to tweak it for you.

Edit: Having read some of the above posts about family ties, they are valid, but my recommendation is to "get the hell out of Dodge." If your wife wants to move also, it's an easy decision. One day, down in Lafayette, Louisiana, I walked into our apartment and said to my wife "I've been offered a transfer to the Middle East, in a country called Dubai. Should we go? She was six months pregnant with our second child and she jumped at it without reservation. That was back in 1973. Long story short, we lived overseas for the next eleven years - in six different countries - without the Internet and all of its advantages. Having just typed the above, I walked back into the den and asked my bride of forty-two years this question, "If we could live our lives over again, would you have preferred to stay close to home and family?" Her response? Hell NO!

[Stasher1]

I echo everything Stasher said. Moving ain't cheap. If you get there and find out you don't like it or can't find work, then you're poor, and have no family/friends to help. Depending on how much stuff you have, renting for a year can really help you figure out where you want to live. I have done that every time of the three tiems I've moved over the past 8+ years. Mkae sure you like where you're going or it can put a severe strain on your family life. Everybody needs to be happy (especially momma) not just you.

This is something that bears repeating. When you move to another state, you're typically on your own. That may not seem like a big deal right now, but it can become a big deal when/if you have something come up. Even simple things like buying furniture, building a deck, fixing your car/truck, etc. will be more difficult without a buddy to help...and don't even get me started on the lack of "couple time" without the kids. Who are you going to leave them with when/if the two of you want to have a "date night"?

[MCS]

I've moved 5 times since 2006 and I am not military. My kids are born in three different states and none are the one my wife and I where born in. Lol

This last move was employer paid, but we did a uhaul. Had no help, go to movinghelp.com and you can find help we paid $200 (had a piano) and two strong brothas in a beat up car who were very professional( don't judge by looks) un loaded the whole thing in an hour.

As far as finding a job, what skills do you have in oil? Attack that two fold contact a few recruiters get them looking. Also search yourself, indeed.com is a great start. No recruiter fee helped with this recent move. Start as soon as possible, it took me about 6 months to find work and move and I had 10 yrs in the field was willing to move where the good Lord sent me.

The purpose of this last move was we finally realized where we wanted to be and knew our kids where getting to school age and wanted to settle before they started school. I think it is a smart moved to get it done while they are young.

I also got a buddy working as a consultant for oil companies in TX, his father retired from oil companies, great pension from what he said. He really was happy when he was able to start working close to oil. Natural gas industry is hot now too.

[Quillback]

I'd certainly use LongMike's offer to help find a job, and I would not move until I had a job offer. There's a lot of expense associated with moving and setting up life in a new house/apartment, be a good thing to have that paycheck coming in every 2 weeks.

There's also some oil drilling and gas fracking going on here in Arkansas, cost of living is low and some great bass fishing.

[clayton86]

thanks for all the replies guys. I'v been making peace with my old man we email back and forth every day we'll I'm over here deployed. The wife wants to get the hell outa dodge more then I do. We have moved quite a few times staying in the same county and didn't have friends to help us out there not even family so other then the long drive to where ever it wont be no different. I think what I may end up doing is once offered a job move to where ever and get a cheap apt well saving up and looking for a place to bring the family to.

Experience in oil I don't have any I suppose what I was thinking was going in as a field service tech or mechanic of some kind for a company. I went to school for wrenching been doing it sense I was a little kid and now when im not doing my army thing I'm a teachers aide for a agriculture and heavy equipment diesel class. I'm pretty good with mechanical anything. Im open to anything actually hell im even toying the idea of moving to texas or out west and staying in the National Guard but re classing to aviation mechanics and going to an aviation unit. If I do that I will try and get on a search and rescue team in the mountains idk im very undecided what I wanna do and the wife is even worse shes got nothing never held a real job or any job for very long and never went back to school shes smart but stubborn and wants a top job with out having to work for it so she just has been a stay at home mom for the last 5 years our oldest is 3 lol I don't mind though.

[Captain Obvious]

You can't go wrong if your moving to Texas pick a lake and move to a town next to it. Besides even Houston would seem like heaven after living in N.Y.

Problem sloved

Capt.O

[MCS]

You can't go wrong if your moving to Texas pick a lake and move to a town next to it. Besides even Houston would seem like heaven after living in N.Y.

Problem sloved

Capt.O

Yeah man the difference in taxes from NY to TX alone is worth it IMO. I tend to stick with states that have no state income tax, FL and NV I have lived in and can recommend as nice to live, but schooling youngins is not so good. Lol whatever you decide Clayton good luck.

[clayton86]

New York sucks high everything besides employment and salary's. I do love the fishing here though but seeing Big-O's bass who wouldn't want to move to Texas lol. Iv only lived in Connecticut besides New York I loved it there but I was in school and doing the typical 19 year old on his own in college thing ramen, beer, cars, and women lol.

Schools for the little ones is gonna be a big factor along with crime rates and such. We were looking at the Corpus Christi area but did some research and was actually surprised to see the crime was high and education low. I compared it to Buffalo and Rochester and it was actually better crime wise we had higher personal crimes and Corpus had more property crimes. Cost of living seemed cheap though I looked at apartments at craigslist and i could rent a really nice place for the cost of a dump here of the same size if not smaller(here). I forgot what city I read about maybe Huston but it was like the 2nd best city to move to in america because its booming and employments high. Im not a city guy though i like being out in the sticks like i am now 60minutes to the city but only 20-30min from smaller cities that still have everything but the big malls and airports. Im surrounded by farm land and rivers and 4miles north is lake Ontario for some one who loves the outdoors its perfect. But I know Texas is also like hunting and fishing mecca so I doubt id be disappointed as long as im not in the heart of some city.

[MCS]

Houston is nice. My buddy works there, He lives in Katy, I looked into a company or two in that area, the suburbs out that way are really nice, homes are affordable too compared to NY and where I am from VA/MD. Best part you will be able to keep your saltwater habit in addition to big bass.......Dorado!....San Antonio and Austin are also very nice places to live.

[Captain Obvious]

Houston and Austin :thumbsdown: I'm talking about North Texas my friend.

North of Dallas has plenty of wide open spaces no hurricanes better sports teams and did I mention that the lakes around here spit out 10lb bass like a kid eating sprouts.

Capt.O

[MCS]

Houston and Austin :thumbsdown: I'm talking about North Texas my friend.

North of Dallas has plenty of wide open spaces no hurricanes better sports teams and did I mention that the lakes around here spit out 10lb bass like a kid eating sprouts.

Capt.O

Sorry its wasnt that obvious. U talking about I40.....Amarillo, Lubbock??

Lots of bean fields but I hear you. It is good country and good folks up there. Maybe a littl too cold in the winter and a little too rural for me and no beach.

That is the only part of Texas I have actually set foot in.

But what sports teams lol

[Captain Obvious]

MCS I'm talking above Dallas like, Lewisville, Denton, Gainesville. And North Texas is everything to the east of the panhandle. But anywhere around the DFW area is alright. As a matter of fact Fort Worth isn't to bad either.

At the end of the day its all God's country so you can't choose a bad place.

Capt.O

[clayton86]

Sorry its wasnt that obvious. U talking about I40.....Amarillo, Lubbock??

Lots of bean fields but I hear you. It is good country and good folks up there. Maybe a littl too cold in the winter and a little too rural for me and no beach.

That is the only part of Texas I have actually set foot in.

But what sports teams lol

from Buffalo and spend my winters at Ft. Drum I think I could handle a Texas winter lol.

[Quillback]

Check out Northwest Arkansas for jobs also. Low cost of living (but Arkansas does have a state income tax). Lots of fishing within a 2 hour radius, Beaver lake (just a fair black bass lake, but a pretty good striper lake), Table Rock, Grand Lake over in Oklahoma, Stockton Lake in Missouri, Bull Shoals is 2-3 hours away depending on where you live.

JB Hunt trucking is headquartered here, as is Wal-Mart. Might be some opportunity for a guy with a wrench.

Lot of public land to deer hunt on, bow season goes on for about 6 months.