OK, here is a second way to look at all of this:
My Dad was married before my Mom and had 2 kids. His wife at the time(not my Mom) ran around on him and took his 2 kids out of state. At the time, for Fathers to get visitation rights, you had to live in the same state, and he was financially not able to move and not willing to do so to leave his sick Father. He tried for 2 years with a lawyer to get visitation and countless dollars to no avail. The other lady ended up marrying the guy she ran off with and he adopted my half brother and sister. Their Mom, lied to them about how awful my Dad was (drinking, abusive, you name it). I have never seen my Dad consume an alcoholic beverage in his life. Anyways, they grew up thinking their Dad abandoned them and was a horrible person. I am not saying my Dad is perfect, but he certainly did not do any of these things. My half-brother finally contacted my Dad once he was 18 and realized that it was all lies and we have all had a great relationship since. My half-sister just finally realized this early this year, and is planning a trip to come see my Dad soon. She has now realized that even though their mother was good to them, she was the one to blame and it was all lies. To see my Dad crying like a baby on Father's Day because after all of these years, they finally realized he wasn't a bad person was something I will never forget. He tried every so often to get in touch with them, and like I said he is not perfect, he was never able to because they never wanted to talk to him. He certainly could have tried more and more often as they got older, but it was a very hard subject for him to even bring up. So I say give him a chance. They were both grown adults before they knew their Father, who has become the Dad to one and is striving to become the Dad to the other.
Just sayin
Jeff